1.Some believe that more academic subjects such as chemistry, physics and history should be taught in schools, while others believe that students will derive more benefit from studying practical subjects, such as motor mechanics and cooking. Discuss both views and provide your own opinion with relevant examples.

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Some people nowadays believe that
students
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should be taught more
subjects
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relating to theory and the academy,
such
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as sciences, physics, etc.,
instead
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of learning practical
subjects
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. In my opinion,
due to
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the development of knowledge and
both
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apply
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daily skills, teachers have to orient
students
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to improve their ability to
study
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more in both practical and academic learning.
Firstly
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, all the academic
subjects
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play an important role in the student’s background. The theory provided by schoolmasters can help undergraduates approach world knowledge.
Moreover
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, academic
subjects
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can provide solutions for
students
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in many fields,
such
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as social, financial, and historical,  to create a wonderful knowledge foundation for scholars.
For example
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,
although
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some teachers haven’t been through any
study
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training, they still follow some theories that they have developed from academic
subjects
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.
On the other hand
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, almost every school is now focusing too much on theoretical studies and forgetting to cultivate
alumnus’s
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alumni’s
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practical skills. Many classes,
such
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as sewing, making wood products, motor mechanics, etc., were opened for the same purpose: helping
students
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with their future financial well-being. These lessons allow pupils to earn money for individual needs, whether they choose to continue
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study
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studying
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college or pursue higher degrees or not.
For instance
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, many
students
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have their own jobs because of the practical skills they have learnt before. In fact, many studies found that 58
percent
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per cent
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of graduates who
study
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practical
subjects
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become entrepreneurs, which means they are easier to find jobs than each other.
To conclude
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, I think
students
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could get
better
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a better
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chance of success if they were taught both theoretical and practical
subjects
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at the same time.
Submitted by dohuyhoang on

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coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow of ideas between paragraphs. For example, use transition words or phrases more effectively to connect ideas.
task achievement
Provide more specific and relevant examples to support each viewpoint for a stronger argument.
task achievement
Ensure each main point is thoroughly explained and expanded upon. Some points are briefly mentioned but not elaborated on.
task achievement
Your essay addresses both views and provides a clear opinion, which satisfies the prompt requirements.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the essay is mostly logical, with separate paragraphs for each viewpoint and the conclusion.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • academic subjects
  • practical subjects
  • critical thinking
  • problem-solving skills
  • holistic education
  • curriculum
  • real-life challenges
  • job opportunities
  • foundations
  • professions
  • balanced approach
  • job market
  • demand
  • derive benefit
  • preparation
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