The line graph shows the average number of weekly patients visiting four clinics of a hospital from 2010 to 2016.
The feature
illustrate
the data that contained the amount of weekly Change the verb form
illustrates
patients
encouragement for clinics in a hospital between 2010 and 2016.
Fix the agreement mistake
patient
Overall
it can be seen that,
eye Remove the comma
apply
patients
got
Verb problem
apply
an
increased and Correct article usage
apply
reach
the highest number in 2016, whilst in 2010 Wrong verb form
reached
diabetic
Fix the agreement mistake
diabetics
keep
the lowest number and Wrong verb form
kept
got
Verb problem
apply
climb
up after that. Birth control and dental Wrong verb form
climbed
also
soared too
.
Beginning with the Rephrase
apply
people
got problem
with Fix the agreement mistake
problems
Correct pronoun usage
their eye
eye
, it Fix the agreement mistake
eyes
start
at around 125 Wrong verb form
started
people
in 2010 and then
rised
significantly to 350 Correct your spelling
raised
rose
rise
person
in 2016. Moving onto Change to a plural noun
people
diabetic
, those Replace the word
diabetes
people
begin
at nearly 60 Wrong verb form
began
people
in 2010, which was the lowest on
in four clinics Change preposition
apply
then
it got fluctuation until 2014 and begin
to Wrong verb form
began
climbed
up steadily to 175 Change the verb
climb
patients
in 2016.
Turning to the remaining statistic, it can be observed that dental got a deep from 100 to approximately 115 patients
between 2010 and 2014, before it increased slightly to around 145 patients
in 2016. Moving onto birth control, which got the highest started in 2010 at nearly 350 sick people
, it’s
Unnecessary verb
it
also
went up slowly to 2012 until it dropped considerably to around 170 people
and come
back Wrong verb form
came
at
nearly 250 Change preposition
to
patients
in 2016.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Contractions: Don't use contractions.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words patients, people with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "climb" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
▼