THE GRAPHS BELOW SHOW THE PERCENTAGE OF MEN AND WOMAN AGED 60-64 WHO WERE EMPLOYED IN FOUR COUNTRIES IN 1970 AND 2000.

#graphs #show #percentage #men #woman #four #countries

CONTAINED IN THE BAR CHART IS DATA THAT THE MEN AND

WOMAN

Fix the agreement mistake

WOMEN

show examples

AGED 60-64 WHO WERE EMPLOYED IN 4 COUNTRIES BETWEEN 1970 AND 2000. THE DATA WERE RECORDED IN PERCENT (%).

OVERALL

, IT CAN BE SEEN THAT THE HIGHEST

FIGURE

IN 2000 IS

JAPAN

AND THE LOWEST

FIGURE

IN 1970 IS

BELGIUM

IN THE

WOMAN

'S PERIOD THE

JAPAN

IS THE HIGHEST

FIGURE

IN 2000 AND THE

BELGIUM

THE LOWEST

FIGURE

IN 1970 SIMILAR THE

WOMAN

. LOOKING AT THE DATA MORE CLOSELY, IT CAN BE OBSERVED THAT IN 2000,

BELGIUM

STARTED AT 8% AND ROSE UP TO THE HIGHEST AT 43% IN

JAPAN

. SUDDENTLY DECREASED IN AUSTRALIA WITH 16%.

BESIDES

THAT IN 1970, THE LOWEST

FIGURE

STARTED AT 7% AND INCREASED THE SAME AS IN 2000 UNTIL

JAPAN

AT 40%., FELL DOWN TO 18% IN AUSTRALIA IN THE

WOMAN

CHART. TURNING TO THE REMAINING FIGURES,

IT IS CLEAR THAT

MEN'S

Correct article usage

THE MEN'S

show examples

CHART

BELGIUM

STARTED AT 79% DRAMATICALLY INCREASING TO THE HIGHEST IN

JAPAN

AT ABOUT 86% IN 2000.

FINALLY

BELGIUM

HAVE A DIFFERENT THAN EACH

FIGURE

WHICH WAS DECREASED.

BELGIUM

STARTED AT 19 % AND WENT UP TO 74% IN

JAPAN

IN 1970 AND DECREASED TO 47% IN AUSTRALIA.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words woman, figure, japan, belgium with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 7 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 3 times.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

198 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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THE GRAPHS BELOW SHOW THE PERCENTAGE OF MEN AND WOMAN AGED 60-64 WHO WERE EMPLOYED IN FOUR COUNTRIES IN 1970 AND 2000.

Many people around the world use social media every day to keep in touch with other people and get news events. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

A big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree?

The two figures below show the rate of criminal convictions among men and women of different ages in the UK and the proportion of male and female prison inmates in the British prison system. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?