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Band 5.5

The pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparison where relevant.

The pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparison where relevant.
#show #sales #sectors #zealand #information #features #comparison
The pie charts
illustrates
Change the verb form
illustrate
show examples
 the percentages of online use in retail sectors located in New Zealand in two
period
Change to a plural noun
periods
show examples
 of time 2003 and 2013, additinally it gives information
of
Change preposition
about
show examples
 four
catigouries
Correct your spelling
categories
 which are travel , films, books, and clothes measured in
percentage
Fix the agreement mistake
percentages
show examples
. As it shows the domain type of retail
is
Wrong verb form
was
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 travel in 2003 ,
while
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 clear that
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
 of New Zealand
shifts
Wrong verb form
shifted
show examples
 to films in 2013.
Moreover
, books had the
last
 stage in 2003 compared to 2013 with
Correct article usage
a slightly
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slightly
Change the word
slight
show examples
inceasing
Correct your spelling
increasing
 in
propution
Correct your spelling
proportion
.
Although
 cloths
where
Correct your spelling
were
show examples
 the higher
amout
Correct your spelling
amount
 of
consuming
Replace the word
consumption
show examples
 in 2003 with 24% ,
In contrast
 to 2013 with 16% .
to sum up
, the four types
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
experince
Correct your spelling
experience
experienced
 some way of
changs
Correct your spelling
changes
show examples
 other way decreasing or
increasing
Wrong verb form
increases
show examples
 in percentage of
consuming comparing
Replace the word
consumption
show examples
 between 2003 and 2013 can be easily defined.
Submitted by Selfigih7 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.
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