The pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparison where relevant.

The pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparison where relevant.
The
pies
Change the noun form
pie
show examples
graph
illustrate
Correct subject-verb agreement
illustrates
show examples
the online shopping expenditure for retail in the following sectors: (Travel, film\music, books and clothes) in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013.
Overall
, it is obvious from the graphs that in 2003
people
travelled more than they did in 2013.
However
, in 2013 it seems
people
liked music and movies more.
To begin
with, looking at the pie of 2003, travel took the top sales by 36%.
People
were not interested in reading books which made up for 19% only. shopping for outwear accounted for 24% followed by tickets for music festivals and movies by 21%
repectively
Correct your spelling
respectively
. The chart of 2013 showed an interesting increase for the film and music sector, the
perecentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
growed
Correct your spelling
grew
show examples
from 21% to 33%. Meanwhile,
people
bought
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
clothes in 2013
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
to 2003 by 8%. Followed by travel which went down to 29%.
In addition
to that, there was a slight increase in buying books by 19%
Submitted by a-la-a-11 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words people with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: