IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The diagrams above show information about the
police
Use synonyms
 financial management in the UK between 2017 and 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
, the sum of
police
Use synonyms
 income
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
rise
Add an article
the rise
show examples
 and spent mostly on their employees.
According to
Linking Words
 the table, The Government played a significant role in supporting the
police
Use synonyms
financial
Replace the word
finances
show examples
,
gave
Wrong verb form
giving
show examples
 them slightly above 175
million
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
pound
Fix the agreement mistake
pounds
show examples
 sterling in 2017 followed
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
local taxes and other sources by above ninety
million
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
pound
Fix the agreement mistake
pounds
show examples
 sterling and 38
million
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
pound
Fix the agreement mistake
pounds
show examples
 sterling, respectively.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in 2018, there
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 a lot of
rose
Correct your spelling
raised
show examples
 budget for the
police
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, the budget
comes
Verb problem
apply
show examples
from the National Government had
rise
Change the verb form
risen
show examples
 by approximately two
million
Use synonyms
as well as
Linking Words
 the local taxes which rose by 11,1
million
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
pound
Fix the agreement mistake
pounds
show examples
 sterling.
On the other
Linking Words
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
 the other sources rose a little by half a
million
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
pound
Fix the agreement mistake
pounds
show examples
 sterling. The money
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the UK
police
Use synonyms
 had
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 these years must
be distribute
Change the verb form
be distributed
show examples
 properly,
therefore
Linking Words
, in both years they spent mostly on paying the
employees
Change noun form
employee's
employees'
show examples
 payroll, particularly for their officers and staff.
Moreover
Linking Words
, they chose to
maintained
Change the verb
maintain
show examples
 the facilities
such
Linking Words
 as buildings and vehicles by spending eight per cent in 2017 and fourteen per cent in 2018 .
Lastly
Linking Words
, they selected
to upgrade in
Change the verb form
upgrading
show examples
 technology as the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
least
Correct your spelling
last
show examples
 option.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words police, million, pound with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Fiscal allocations
  • Revenue streams
  • Budgetary oversight
  • Expenditure
  • Financial appropriation
  • Government grants
  • Local taxation
  • Operational costs
  • Capital investment
  • Public safety
  • Crime prevention
  • Community policing
  • Resource allocation
  • Year-on-year comparison
  • Budgetary constraints
  • Fiscal year
  • Fund disbursement
  • Budget deficit/surplus
  • Trend analysis
  • Financial sustainability
  • Law enforcement funding
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