IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The chart below shows the total number of minutes ( in billions ) of telephone calls in the UK, divided into three categories, from 1995 to 2002.

The chart below shows the total number of minutes ( in billions ) of telephone calls in the UK, divided into three categories, from 1995 to 2002.
#minutes #billions #telephone #uk #three #categories
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Contained in the bar chart is data pertaining to the amount of time of the UK telephone calls by three different types during
eight-year
Add an article
the eight-year
show examples
 period between 1995 and 2002. Units are measured in minute billions (
MB
Use synonyms
).
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that the
local-fixed
Correct your spelling
local fixed
show examples
line
Use synonyms
 call had kept
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 similar point at the start and finish,
whereas
Linking Words
 the others had gone up throughout the timeframe.
In addition
Linking Words
, mobiles had a
significance
Replace the word
significant
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
increase making it the biggest difference over the eight-year period. Beginning with the local-fixed
line
Use synonyms
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
further
Linking Words
 detail, it started at about 70MB in 1995,
then
Linking Words
 gradually increased and reached a peak at 90MB in 1999, but there was a steady drop in its figures and ended at the same point
with
Change preposition
as
show examples
 the start in 2002.
Besides
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 type of telephone
calls
Fix the agreement mistake
call
show examples
 was the highest figure throughout the timeframe. Moving onto two different categories in the remaining statistics, where there was
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 upward trend from 1995 to 2002. With respect to national and international-fixed
Use synonyms
line
Fix the agreement mistake
lines
show examples
, it was just under 40MB in 1995 and kept the second highest figure. In the following years, its time slightly rose and stopped at over 60MB in 2002. Regarding mobiles, it started at the lowest point by approximately 5MB in the first year of
this
Linking Words
 period. Much like national and international-fixed
Use synonyms
line
Fix the agreement mistake
lines
show examples
, it steadily increased in the next four years,
then
Linking Words
 there was a sharp rise in figure and ended at around 45MB, making it the biggest difference.
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words mb, line with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "difference" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • total number
  • minutes
  • telephone calls
  • UK
  • divided into
  • categories
  • from
  • to
  • overall
  • increased significantly
  • local fixed-line calls
  • accounted for
  • largest proportion
  • throughout
  • period
  • international calls
  • highest rate of growth
  • experiencing
  • sharp increase
  • national long-distance calls
  • remained relatively stable
  • slight decline
  • towards
  • end
What to do next:
Look at other essays: