Some people think it is better for children to grown up in the city, while others think that life in the countryside is more suitable for them. What are the advantages and disadvantages of both places.

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Although
many
parents
think that
growing up
Verb problem
raising
show examples
their
children
in the
city
could benefit their modern lifestyle and will give
more
Correct pronoun usage
them more
show examples
accessible
facilities
than in the countryside, some
parents
also
decided
Wrong verb form
decide
show examples
to let their
children
grown
Wrong verb form
grow
show examples
up in the countryside.
Therefore
, there are advantages and disadvantages for
parents
to decide where the
children
should live and spend their development period. In
this
modern era, living in the
city
will provide more
accessible
Replace the word
access
show examples
to the
facilities
required by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
children
to
perfom
Correct your spelling
perform
well in their daily activities,
such
as transportation, communication, education, healthcare, and so on.
Additionally
, the opportunity for expanding networking in the globalization age will boost
children
's perspectives
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
the more futuristic
world
, especially in deciding what
future
skills
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
they should acquire to
pursure
Correct your spelling
pursue
their dreams.
However
, living in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
metropolitan cities should be provided with
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
sense of caring
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nature
and human interaction. Since the development of cutting-edge modern
facilities
, people are now being isolated in the digital
world
,
such
as communication
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
mostly via virtual or social media which actually
reduce
Correct subject-verb agreement
reduces
show examples
the
nature
of social interaction.
Furthermore
, the
rising
Replace the word
rise
show examples
of huge technologies
due to
demand
Correct article usage
the demand
show examples
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
living in the
city
is
Verb problem
could
show examples
now potentially
could
Verb problem
apply
show examples
damage
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nature
,
such
as global warming. Meanwhile, the importance of education to
children
during
development
Add an article
the development
show examples
process in the
city
is vital for
parents
to prevent more detrimental for the
future
world
and humanity. On the other side,
children
who spend their childhood in the village will comprehend more about the essence of protecting
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nature
and
maintain
Wrong verb form
maintaining
show examples
social interaction. They will be more exposed to the importance of protecting
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nature
,
such
as
forest
Fix the agreement mistake
forests
show examples
or the river.
However
,
due to
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of
facilities
, particularly education, healthcare, and technologies, the opportunity for
children
who live in the countryside to obtain broader information or maintain their well-being will be less compared to the
children
who spent their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
in the cities. In summary, deciding where to
grow
Verb problem
raise
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
children
is important for their
future
and the role of
parents
to analyze the pros and cons should be wise. Maintaining the balance on both sides will be more necessary
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
the
future
of the
children
and the
world
.
Submitted by fakhruddinmasse on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure your ideas are structured logically throughout the essay. Group related ideas together in a clear sequence, and use transition words where necessary to make connections between points. Avoid repetitions and stay focused on answering the question directly.
task achievement
Introduce more specific examples to illustrate your points and strengthen your arguments. Ensure these examples are relevant to the topic at hand. For instance, mention specific activities or benefits children might have in a city versus the countryside.
coherence cohesion
Work on expanding your vocabulary and avoiding repetitive phrases. This will help improve both the coherence of your essay and the clarity of your ideas. Consider using synonyms and more diverse expressions to articulate your thoughts more vividly.
task achievement
Try to stay concise and avoid overcomplicating sentences. Clarity and simplicity can often better convey your ideas than long, convoluted sentences. Reread your sentences to check for any unnecessary complexity that could be simplified.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-presented and provide a clear framework for the essay. Each includes a general statement about the topic and concludes with a summarizing idea, which helps form a complete response.
task achievement
There is a solid attempt to weigh the pros and cons of both city and countryside living, addressing the main aspects mentioned in the prompt. This demonstrates an understanding of the task.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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