The pie chart below shows the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013

#sales #sectors #zealand

The pie chart presents the volume of retail

sector

sales

travel

film

music

, books and

clothes

over

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

online in New Zealand in the

year

Fix the agreement mistake

years

show examples

2003 and 2013.

According to

the data, it is evident that the

sales

travel

and the

clothes

sectors

saw a downward trend,

while

the

film

music

and the book

sectors

increased substantially. Notably, the

clothes

sector

showed a considerable drop from the

second highest

Add a hyphen

second-highest

show examples

online

sales

to the least of online shopping

sales

over the next decade. In 2003, the

travel

sector

accounted for the dominant share of the market, at 36%, and the

clothes

sector

was the second highest in total online

sales

at 24%.

However

, in 2013, these two figures experienced a significant fall to 29% and 16% respectively. Compared with the two

sectors

mentioned above,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

online

sales

for

film

music

increased from 21% in 2003 to 33% in 2013, making it the greatest proportion of total online

sales

in the retail

sectors

. The book

sector

rose from 19% in 2003 to 22% in 2013, reaching the same level as the

film

music

sector

in 2003.

Overall

, the data indicates a shift in consumer preferences in the online retail

sector

over the specified period, with a remarkable decline in the

travel

and

clothes

sectors

and significant growth in

film

Correct article usage

the film

show examples

music

and book

sectors

Submitted by bhavifasai on Sun Jun 02 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 78%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words sector, sales, travel, film, music, clothes, sectors with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

220 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The pie chart below shows the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The graph highlights data about the amount of carbon dioxide (CO2) gas produced per person by four European countries over a forty-year period between 1967 and 2007

Some people think that modern technology has more negative effects on our lives than positive ones. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant example from your own knowledge or experience.

Some say that the most important thing abpit beimg rich is that one has the opportunity to help others. To what extend do you agree pr disagree?

In many countries children are taught discipline using both means encouragement as well as punishment. Which method is more suitable and effective? Is discipline necessary for children.

In the future all cars, buses, and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages? Write at least 250 words.