The following is an essay submitted by one of our students. In some countries, governments are encouraging industries and businesses to move to regional areas outside the big cities. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

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these days some countries' governments are encouraging

industries

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also

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businesses

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move

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to regional areas outside the big cities

this

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essay will discuss both sides and draw my personal conclusion On one hand, the advantages

encouraging

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of encouraging

show examples

industries

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and

businesses

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to change places

industries

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to a free

place

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and to a good

place

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for

city

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the city

show examples

and to the best

place

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for example

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now some countries taking

this

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step so Kuwait taking

this

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and many governments see

this

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idea as important

in addition

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to moving the

industries

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as well as

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a business

this

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has many advantages one of the lot advantages that helps

people

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to spend good life

then

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and

that is

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dangers on animals so that give city many places because the

industries

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business pick large places and much spaces

furthermore

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that are subjects countries On the other disadvantage encouraging

industries

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then

Linking Words

businesses

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has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

many disadvantages one of mush the changing

place

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that wants money

this

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reason loss money of company

then

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the government

also

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this

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causes dangers

live

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to live

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the animals

also

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if want to go to

industries

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that need time because

way

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the way

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some

people

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do not think

this

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is a good job

also

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now some

people

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asking of government do not

move

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the pleas reason in

industries

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work there

people

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so the job is important of

people

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In conclusion, after watching both points of view.I believe the

move

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industries

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in addition

Linking Words

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businesses

Change preposition

to businesses

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that are important now must

move

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because

that is

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a problem for

people

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and that damage to oxygen and oxygen is important to

people

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s97580011Sun Jun 02 2024

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coherence

Try to develop your ideas more clearly and logically. Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea supported with relevant examples. For instance, explaining why moving industries helps reduce pollution could make your point stronger.

cohesion

Work on improving your sentence structure and grammar to enhance the readability of your essay. For example, using linking words like 'Firstly,' 'Additionally,' and 'However,' will help in organizing your ideas.

task response

Avoid generalizations and overly broad statements. Providing specific examples and details can make your arguments more convincing. For instance, instead of saying 'many advantages,' specify what these advantages are.

general

You have made an effort to discuss both sides of the argument, which is a good practice for a balanced essay.

conclusion

You have a clear conclusion that reflects your opinion on the matter, which is essential for a coherent essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

6 paragraphs

256 words

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The following is an essay submitted by one of our students. In some countries, governments are encouraging industries and businesses to move to regional areas outside the big cities. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

One of your friends has asked you to be a partner in his new business. Write a letter to reply to your friend’s offer. In your letter -Give your opinion of your friend’s business idea. - Tell him whether or not you have decided to accept his offer - and explain your reasons for this decision.

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Some people think that exercise is the key to health, while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree? Provide relevant examples if necessary.