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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

You recently had some items shipped to you from overseas. Upon receiving the shipment you found that some things were damaged in transit. Write a letter to the manager of the shipping company. In your letter - Provide the details of your shipment - Describe the damage - Say what action you want the company to take.

#items #shipment #transit #manager #company #damage #action
Dear Sir, I am Anushri ,I recently used your company service to transfer some antique wall decor from Singapore.I am writing
this
 letter to you,regarding the dissatisfaction about the damage of the goods I received from your shipping services. First of all,I took the service by calling your office on October 14,
then
 your workers had my items from me on October 17.
Furthermore
,they informed me that I will be receiving the decors on December end.But,I received it on January 20 only. To my surprise, when I opened the box I saw a terrible crack upward from the decors which totally spoiled the look of it.
Additionally
,it is neither going to look good nor safe for my family .
Due to
this
 reason,please take some necessary action on your company side to check on what happened
as well as
 provide me with some compensation for the loss incurred for me with the total price of the wall decor and for the shipment of the item. Awaiting
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for
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your quick response and the compensation. Thanking you. Yours sincerely, Anushri.
Submitted by nusramkumar on

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coherence cohesion
Try to avoid run-on sentences by breaking them into smaller, more manageable parts. This helps improve readability and coherence.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph covers only a single main idea. This will enhance the overall clarity of your letter.
task achievement
You have provided all necessary details regarding the shipment, including the timeline and the nature of the damage.
task achievement
The tone of the letter is appropriate for a formal complaint, which is suitable for the context.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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