Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like Science and Technology are more important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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In contemporary times, there exists a paramount emphasis on the important level of school

subjects

Use synonyms

, eliciting a plethora of debates on

this

Linking Words

topic. Several individuals think that

history

Use synonyms

is one of the most important school

subjects

Use synonyms

however

Linking Words

, others believe that, in today's world,

history

Use synonyms

is not as crucial as

subjects

Use synonyms

involving

science

Use synonyms

and

technology

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. Personally, in

this

Linking Words

essay, I would like to discuss both sides before giving my opinion. On the one hand,

it is clear that

Linking Words

not only does

history

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help residents to know about their original ancestors, but it

also

Linking Words

is the best way to pass down culture from generation to generation.

As a result

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

contributes to developing their patriotism and protecting their culture.

For example

Linking Words

, I studied historical

subjects

Use synonyms

during my childhood. Thanking that, I comprehend that building the nation process of my ancestors is extremely hard and I am proud of my nation and the national heroes who dedicated their whole lives to our country.

Therefore

Linking Words

, I am aware of protecting the valuable culture that they left.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, people

also

Linking Words

claim that, in the technological era,

subjects

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such

Linking Words

technology

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and

science

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are more vital than historical

subjects

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because all aspects of our life from working to leisure involve

technology

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and

science

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Thus

Linking Words

, they like mandatory knowledge for people to catch up with the rhythm of modern life.

For instance

Linking Words

, nowadays, teachers need to know how to use

technology

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to serve their teaching because

blackboard

Correct article usage

the blackboard

show examples

has been altered to the electric board, and books are replaced by computers. Or workers who

also

Linking Words

need to know the

technology

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to operate automatic machines. In conclusion,

although

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both views certainly have some validity, it seems to me that it is more

impotant

Correct your spelling

important

to study

technology

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and

science

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subjects

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than

history

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, today.

writingeiltsSun Jun 02 2024

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coherence cohesion

Your essay demonstrates a good logical structure, but the transitions between sentences and paragraphs can be improved for a smoother flow. Try using more linking words to connect your ideas more effectively.

task achievement

While your essay provides a well-rounded discussion and examples, clarity can be improved by ensuring more precise phrasing and avoiding minor grammatical errors. This will enhance your argument and make your points clearer.

coherence cohesion

You have both an introduction and a conclusion, but ensure that the conclusion ties back to the main arguments more strongly to reinforce your opinion and give a sense of closure.

task achievement

Your essay addresses both views thoroughly and you gave clear, comprehensive ideas with relevant examples. This shows a good understanding and balanced approach to the topic.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are present and well-defined. This helps establish and wrap up your argument effectively.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

296 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cultural heritage
Historical perspective
Analytical skills
Contextual understanding
Technological advancements
STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Mathematics)
Innovation
Interdisciplinary
Job market
Climate crisis
Cultural identity
Critical thinking
Humanities
Contemporary issues
Integration
Tech-savvy

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Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like Science and Technology are more important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

As languages such as English, Spanish and Mandarin become more widely spoken, there is a fear that many minority languages may die out. Some countries have taken steps to protect minority languages.

Many people try to achieve success through their career or education. What can success mean to different people? What is your view of success?

Some people choose to eat no meat or fish. They believe that this is not only better for their own health but also benefits the world as a whole. Discuss this view and give your own opinion.

Many countries spend a lot of money on art. Some people think investment in art is necessary, but others say the money is better spent on improving health and education. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays parents put too much pressure on their children to succeed. What is the reason for doing this? Is this a negative or positive development?