Some people think it is better for a country’s economy for people to spend money while others believe it would be better for people to save money. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #country’s #economy #money

Several

opine

Change to a plural noun

opines

show examples

that a country’s economy would be better off if the population

tend

Wrong verb form

tended

show examples

to spend rather than save.

While

people

who

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

believe saving facilitates economic

growth

, I think spending would leave a bigger impact on the country’s development. On the one hand, people who believe savings generate economic

growth

have few reasons for

such

an idea.

This

could be explained

due to

Change preposition

show examples

the fact that savings allow banks to hold a larger amount of reserved

money

Therefore

this

boosts the financial institutions lending power which allows them to lend

money

out at a lower interest rate.

Hence

, motivates firms to borrow

money

for

further

investment, leading to economic

growth

In addition

to that, savers would

also

benefit from

extra

Add an article

the extra

show examples

income that comes in the form of

interest earning

Add a hyphen

interest-earning

show examples

which they can use for more daily expenses. The rising consumption from

this

would

also

nourish the

economics

Replace the word

economic

show examples

improvement.

On the other hand

, I suggest that spending would act more as a factor that

enhance

Change the verb form

enhances

show examples

economics

Replace the word

economic

show examples

condition

Fix the agreement mistake

conditions

show examples

. Investment and consumption that

tends

Correct subject-verb agreement

tend

show examples

to help the economy grow are by nature two forms of expenses.

For instance

, a purchase of one item in the convenience store

spare

Replace the word

spares

show examples

seller

Correct article usage

a seller

show examples

with extra units of

money

for

further

expenditure which is a growing economic activity.

Moreover

, the action of spending

spread

Wrong verb form

spreads

show examples

Remove the article

apply

show examples

confidence among

money

users, influencing the whole society to perform

economical

Replace the word

economic

show examples

tasks.

Thus

, the idea of economic

growth

from spending is consolidated.

To sum up

, both saving and spending could create economic

growth

due to

discussed reasons.

However

, to achieve the ultimate rate of

growth

, saving and spending

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

at the same time would leave a bigger impact.

Submitted by anhnguyen270407 on Sun Jun 02 2024

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example advice

Consider adding more relevant and specific examples to support your points, especially in the section where you discuss the benefits of spending money.

grammar advice

Make sure to avoid minor grammatical errors and refine sentence structures. This will enhance clarity and coherence in your essay.

task achievement

Your essay has a clear and comprehensive response to the task, addressing both sides of the argument and providing a balanced opinion.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion of your essay are well-structured, providing a clear framework for your argument.

coherence cohesion

Your main points are logically organized, and each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next, which helps in maintaining a coherent flow throughout the essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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15Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

275 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think it is better for a country’s economy for people to spend money while others believe it would be better for people to save money. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Many children no longer read books and instead spend their time using modern technology. While some people think this is a positive trend, others think it is a problem. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some feel that students should not have to take standardized tests in school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

When new towns are planned, it is important to build more public parks and sports facilities rather than shopping centres for people to spend their time in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, owing a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?