Some people prefer to work in the same type of job throughout their lifetime while others like to change the type of job they do. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
A selection of
individuals
opt for working in the same field for their entire lives while
others are fond of changing their type of jobs
frequently. In this
essay, both viewpoints will be outlined before reaching my conclusion which both of them have their positive elements.
At the outset, there are several reasons why people choose to work in the same field and one of the most significant is enjoyable. To elaborate further
, these jobs
are what individuals
longed to be when they were young. Moreover
, these jobs
are well paid
and cover all of their cost of living. An apt illustration of Add a hyphen
well-paid
this
is my brother had decided that he would stay on this
path, as a mechanical engineer, until he gets retired because it has been his dream since he was 10 years old. In addition
, he told me that his company always gives him perks and a large amount of salary, making him feel content and escalated.
On the other side of the coin, it is a fact that some citizens change their type of jobs
frequently and the most crucial reason is that they love challenges. To explain in greater detail, individuals
want to get more experience and all-around knowledge from applying in a variety of fields. Furthermore
, people will get a sense of productivity and progress when they achieve and finish those new tasks. To specifically demonstrate, one of my friends who was studying in
civil engineering with me now changed his job to a programmer because he wanted to gain more knowledge about computer software. Change preposition
apply
Besides
, it was a real challenge for him as he needed to study from zero and he told me that he felt great every time he had his tasks done.
At the end
of the day, it is undeniable that both staying or changing in the same type of jobs
provide individuals
with a number of upsides. From my perspective, it depends on citizens' decisions and personalities as they have freedom
to choose.Add an article
the freedom
Submitted by nnatthinee on
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task response
Your essay provides a balanced discussion on both viewpoints, which is very good. However, you could enhance your response by adding a more explicit thesis statement that clearly states your opinion on the matter.
coherence cohesion
Try to maintain a more consistent use of transitions and connectors throughout your essay to maintain the flow of ideas smoothly. Although you used transitions, at times they felt slightly forced or repetitive.
task response
When providing examples, ensure to link them back explicitly to your argument. Some examples feel a bit disconnected from the main point and could benefit from a clearer link to your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion effectively frame your essay, providing a clear starting point and a concise summary.
task response
You provided relevant and specific examples which help in explaining your points more vividly.
coherence cohesion
Your arguments are coherent and follow a logical structure, making them easy to follow for the reader.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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