IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

The plans below show the site of an airport now and how it will look after redevelopment next year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#plans #show #site #airport #redevelopment #year #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The map illustrates the changes
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 an
airport
 at the present moment and how it will be in the next year.
Overall
, what stands out from the picture is that the southwest part of the
airport
 will experience
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
significant development. In order to expand the area, a great number of facilities will be provided for the
airport
. First of all, people will have access to two
departures’
Change noun form
departures
show examples
 entrances
as well as
 two
arrivals’
Change noun form
arrivals
show examples
ones
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
,
while
 there
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 only one of each in the
airport
 at the present time. If we look at the security passport control,
check-in
Correct article usage
the check-in
show examples
 station will be transferred to the north-east part of the section and replaced by the bag drop station.
In addition
, on the left hand of the
departures
Add a comma
departures,
show examples
 a café will be located. Regarding
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
passport control customs, changing the architecture of the building and creating a new space where cars can be hired by people is another purpose of the redeveloping project.
Moreover
, an ATM will be constructed just on the south part of the new café. What is noticeable, is the transformation of gates which will increase from 8 gates to 18 gates in the next year. Apart from that,
Correct article usage
the walkway
show examples
walkway
Fix the agreement mistake
walkways
show examples
 which is available to individuals will be demolished and make
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
way
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 sky trains in the future.
Submitted by layakhosroabadi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
Your task achievement is quite strong, with a clear understanding of the main changes in the airport redevelopment. However, ensure that all key features are mentioned and described with specific examples where applicable. For instance, the mention of retail shops or waiting lounges could add depth to your response.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your coherence and cohesion are good, with a logical structure that helps the reader understand the redevelopment. However, the conclusion can be slightly more comprehensive to encapsulate the major changes. Also, work on making smoother transitions between points to enhance readability.
Task Achievement
You successfully highlighted the major developments, such as the increase in gates and the addition of new facilities like an ATM and café. This shows good comprehension of the task.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your logical structure is clear, moving from an overview to specific details and comparisons. This makes your essay easy to follow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure
  • terminal
  • runway
  • refurbishment
  • redevelopment
  • amenities
  • car park
  • hangar
  • concourse
  • public transport hub
  • access roads
  • boarding gates
  • check-in desk
  • baggage claim
  • departure lounge
  • observation deck
  • duty-free shopping
What to do next:
Look at other essays: