Nowadays, more and more people from different cities are spending more time away from their families. What are the possible reasons and the effects on the people themselves and their families?

In
this
day and age, the number of individuals born in various regions who choose to stay far from their
families
most of the time is highly increasing. The essay will discuss why is
this
situation and some potential impacts it may have on
people
. The first explanation that can be given is that the majority of
current
Correct article usage
the current
show examples
generation
prefer
Correct subject-verb agreement
prefers
show examples
living in hustle and bustle urban areas to spending their life in
peaceful
Correct article usage
the peaceful
show examples
countryside.
It is clear that
high-tech cities provide more opportunities for humans to learn, work and even entertain when they are able to earn a lot of money, which are not available in small towns or villages.
For instance
,
people
’s curiosity
of
Change preposition
about
show examples
foreign
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
show examples
is more and more popular,
however
, the restaurants serving that kind of food are only developed in large cities because of the economic distribution.
Moreover
, individuals there are allowed to cooperate and work with others from abroad. Family pressure is one of the main reasons for
this
occurring.
Due to
the complexity and danger of society nowadays, parents tend to control their children strictly and extremely.
Therefore
, young
people
often feel tired and depressed, which leads to the desire for independent lives when they move to another place. They believe that they can do everything they enjoy there without
parents’
Correct pronoun usage
their parents’
show examples
prohibition and
complaint
Fix the agreement mistake
complaints
show examples
. The situation happening has both advantages and disadvantages. On the positive side, it offers
people
chances to make new changes and decisions in their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
in order to
get
Verb problem
achieve
show examples
successful achievements. On the negative side, it is likely to cause
unbalanced
Correct article usage
an unbalanced
show examples
distribution of
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
,
furthermore
, because
families
cannot observe the young humans, they easily ignore schooling, fall into social evils via friends
enticing
Verb problem
apply
show examples
and lack
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
love and connection with other members in
families
. In conclusion, leaving
families
and starting a new life away from them is caused by a variety of factors including personal and social reasons.
In addition
, it can influence
people
with both good and bad effects.

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general
While your essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, consider further elaborating on your main points to improve cohesion. Providing more detailed examples can strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Enhance the logical flow between paragraphs and ideas. Utilize more transition words and phrases to better link your points.
task achievement
For a higher score in task achievement, try to develop each point in more depth and provide more specific examples. This will help make your arguments more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and focused introduction and conclusion, which helps guide the reader through your arguments.
task achievement
You address multiple reasons and effects related to the topic, showing a comprehensive understanding of the issue.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Professional commitments
  • Economic factors
  • Career opportunities
  • Demanding careers
  • High-paying jobs
  • Higher education
  • Prestigious universities
  • Specialized training programs
  • Economic opportunities
  • Living costs
  • Healthcare services
  • Medical treatments
  • Feeling of loneliness
  • Stress levels
  • Mental health issues
  • Lack of family support
  • Close relationships
  • Weakened family bonds
  • Communication gaps
  • Emotional distress
  • Physical separation
  • Strain on marital relationships
  • Parenting
  • Personal freedom
  • Social interactions
  • Lifestyle choices
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