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Band 5.5

With a fast pace of modern life more and more people are turning towards fast food for their main meals. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#pace #life #people #food #meals
In recent
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
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, fast
food
 has become
quiet
Correct your spelling
quite
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 famous amongst
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society as a larger number of
population
Correct article usage
the population
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shift
Wrong verb form
has shifted
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 to eating processed
food
 for breakfast, lunch and dinner. I
would
Wrong verb form
will
show examples
 be explicating the merits and demerits of
this
 notion
along with
 valid reasons and illustrations that lean mostly towards the drawbacks. On the one hand, grabbing a burger or a sandwich on the way to work or school in the rush hours of
Correct article usage
the mornings
show examples
mornings
Fix the agreement mistake
morning
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, conveniently suits
a
Correct article usage
the
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 lifestyle of an individual in
this
 busy world. To elaborate, a study by a Youtuber delineated that the time taken to prepare a
home cooked
Add a hyphen
home-cooked
show examples
 meal is significantly higher than buying breakfast from a fast
food
 chain.
Therefore
, the convenience factor of preferring
McDonalds
Change noun form
Mcdonald's
Mcdonalds'
show examples
 or KFC
instead
 of cooking at home is certainly a plus point.
Moreover
, since junk
food
 does not require the purchase of fresh produce on a daily basis, they have the liberty to sell their products at cheaper and attractive price points.
Thus
, more and more people turn towards fast foods because grocery shopping and preparing meals
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 comparatively expensive.
On the other hand
, breakfast is eaten like a king’s meal which means the first meal of the day should contain all necessary nutrients. Having said that, the processed
food
 industry produces in bulk and
freeze
Correct subject-verb agreement
freezes
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 the
food
 items until sold by adding preservatives and
food
colorings
Change the spelling
colourings
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.
Subsequently
, the meals consumed
from
Change preposition
by
show examples
 these
food
 industries carry negligible amounts of nutrients
as well as
 high amounts of harmful chemicals which result in health issues.
For example
, a scientific journal published that a substance called phosphate additives present in beef patties in an established fast
food
 chain is one of the main causes of stomach cancer.
Furthermore
,
countries
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in countries
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 like
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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, where junk
food
 consumption is high,
prevalence
Add an article
the prevalence
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 of obesity is skyrocketing.
Thus
, when the health of citizens in a nation is compromised, the future of that country is inevitably in danger.
To conclude
, the
long term
Add a hyphen
long-term
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 effects on health conditions
consequently
effecting
Replace the word
affecting
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 the whole population
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 not worth the cost and
time effective
Add a hyphen
time-effective
show examples
 facets of opting for processed meals.
Submitted by sajeendranrajakumar on

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task
Your essay provides a complete response to the task by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of fast food consumption. However, to improve your task achievement score, consider giving a more balanced argument with specific examples for both sides. You can also enhance your explanations and link them more effectively to the advantages and disadvantages.
both
Your essay has a logical structure and flows well from one point to the next. To further improve coherence and cohesion, ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next with clear linking words. Additionally, ensure that each point is supported with specific examples and evidence.
both
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, helping to frame your argument well.
both
You've used appropriate transitions and cohesive devices to help link your ideas together, making the essay easier to follow.
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