IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

Some people think its better to choose friends who always have the same opinions as them.Other people say believe its good to have friends who sometimes disagree with them. Discuss boths views and give your own opinion

#people #friends #boths
Friends
 play a crucial role in our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
, as we spend a great deal with them. For some
individuals
Add a comma
individuals,
show examples
 it is better to communicate with someone who all the time has
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
similar opinions rather than with the humankind who has a disagreement view. I will discuss some pros and cons of
chosen
Wrong verb form
choosing
show examples
 different
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
show examples
 of
friend
Fix the agreement mistake
friends
show examples
.
One
Correct your spelling
On
show examples
 the one hand there are many factors why it is valuable to have
friends
 with the same opinion.
For instance
, he
imagine
Change the verb form
imagines
show examples
 himself in the situation as you and can help you faster.
In addition
 to
this
, having equal opinions with your friend can avoid conflict, so your friendship may lost for
long
Correct article usage
a long
show examples
.
On the other hand
,
since
Change preposition
apply
show examples
having disagreements on some topics would lead to
discussion
Add an article
a discussion
show examples
 between
friends
 and develop intellectual level.
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
show examples
 a friend with
different
Correct article usage
a different
show examples
 view informs you
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 negative consequences.
However
 strong disagreement can often ruin friendship. In conclusion, I believe that people should have a good mix of
friends
 who
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 diverse opinions. Personally, I think that we should select
friends
 who sometimes have contrasting visions to ours as it benefits us more.
Submitted by rohilaimronshoeva1 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
You should work on providing more relevant and specific examples to support your main ideas. This can help in making your arguments stronger and more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to maintain a logical structure throughout your essay. Some points appear somewhat fragmented at times.
task achievement
Try to avoid using vague phrases like 'some individuals' and 'humankind.' Instead, aim for clearer, more precise language.
coherence cohesion
Consider revising certain awkward or unclear phrases, such as 'avoid conflict, so your friendship may lost for long.' Improving these areas will enhance the clarity of your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, helping the reader understand your stance on the topic.
task achievement
You have approached the topic by discussing both views, which shows a balanced perspective.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: