IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The Table below shows the results of a survey that asked 6800 Scottish adults (aged 16 years and over) whether they had taken part in different cultural activities in the past 12 months.

The Table below shows the results of a survey that asked 6800 Scottish adults (aged 16 years and over) whether they had taken part in different cultural activities in the past 12 months.
#results #survey #scottish #adults #years #part #activities #months
The given table illustrates the findings from a survey among 6800 adults in Scotland who were aged 16 and above, regarding their participation in various cultural activities in the past year.
Overall
, as can be seen from the graph, any performance and undertaking any crafts were
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
 popular categories for all
age
 groups. With regard to
16
Correct article usage
the 16
show examples
-24 and 25-44
age
 groups, any performance
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
had
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
show examples
 percentages which were 35% and 22% respectively. And
conversily
Correct your spelling
conversely
,
computer based
Add a hyphen
computer-based
show examples
 for 16-24
ages
Change the noun form
age
show examples
group
 and any writing for 24-44
age
group
 were the least popular categories which were 9% and 6% respectively. In terms of
45
Correct article usage
the 45
show examples
-74
aged
Replace the word
age
show examples
groups
Fix the agreement mistake
group
show examples
,
percentage
Correct article usage
the percentage
show examples
 of people who participated in undertaking any craft which
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 the most popular
activities, at
Replace the word
activity was
show examples
 22%.
In contrast
,
computer based
Add a hyphen
computer-based
show examples
 and any writing were
least
Correct article usage
the least
show examples
 preferable categories for
this
age
group
.
On the other hand
,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
all aged 16 and over had a significant percentage in any performance category, at 22%.
Additionally
,
proportion
Add an article
the proportion
show examples
 of people who preferred
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
computer based
Add a hyphen
computer-based
show examples
 activities
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
lowest
Correct article usage
the lowest
show examples
 in
this
age
group
, at 6%.
Submitted by svdnruslu on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words age, group with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: