In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent o improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words
In many countries, some
people
believe that paying large amount
of Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
money
on constructing new railway
routes for super fast trains is crucial, whereas
other people
claim that spending money
on development
of present public Add an article
the development
transportation
is more necessary. I think this
is a challenging topic but with
some Change preposition
for
reasons
it is better to finance in improving public Add a comma
reasons,
transportation
.
In my point of view, spend
Wrong verb form
spending
money
on developing and expanding public transport is more
essential because in a city many Correct quantifier usage
apply
people
due to
over population
and industrialisation, usually Correct your spelling
overpopulation
they
get stuck in heavy traffic in Correct pronoun usage
apply
hustle
and bustle time and actually they cannot do their stuff. So, If a government has a plan to create more railways for subways and expand them with lots of stations, Correct article usage
the hustle
people
prefer to use train
to reach their destinations. Fix the agreement mistake
trains
Additionally
, they should increase buses and taxies
for Correct your spelling
taxis
people
whenever thay
want.
Of course, Correct your spelling
they
the
governments can create new modern means of Correct article usage
apply
transportation
to have competition
with other nations Wrong verb form
compete
such
as monorail
, flight cars and other innovative vehicles. Fix the agreement mistake
monorails
Although
these improvements are so effective, some people
believe that making new railway
lines for special trains is more important. In my opinion, when this
idea become
crucial Change the verb form
becomes
that
many cities and countries become close to each other like most Correct word choice
apply
european
nations. Many countries Change the capitalization
European
such
as Germaney
, France, the Netherlands, England and other nations are linked with super fast Correct your spelling
Germany
railway
. Fix the agreement mistake
railways
That is
really time saving
.
Add a hyphen
time-saving
To sum up
, there is an argue
between two groups of Replace the word
argument
people
to spend money
on railway
system for very fast trains and public Correct article usage
the railway
transports
. It Fix the agreement mistake
transport
is depend
on Change the verb form
depends
situation
of Add an article
the situation
a
country but Correct article usage
the
generally
it is preferable to make finance in public Add a comma
generally,
transportation
to make easy
situation for Correct pronoun usage
it easy
people
to live better.Submitted by brightstargalaxy on
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introduction clarity
Your introduction sets up the debate well. However, it's slightly vague. Clarify your stance more explicitly at the end of the introduction so it's clear what your main argument will be.
paragraph structure
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that all sentences within the paragraph support this main idea. This will improve the logical structure and cohesion of your essay.
supporting evidence
Provide more specific examples or evidence to support your points. This can enhance the relevance and specificity of your arguments.
conclusion clarity
Improve your conclusion by succinctly summarizing both sides of the argument and clearly restating your opinion. This will enhance the completeness of your response.
understanding topic
Your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and the main arguments on both sides.
balanced discussion
You present a balanced discussion, considering both viewpoints before providing your own opinion.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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