You are going to another country to study. You would like to do a part-time job while you are studying, so you want to ask a friend who lives there for some help. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter: Give details of your study plans. Explain why you want to get a part-time job. Suggest how your friend could help you find a job.

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Dear Abel, I'

Use synonyms

elated to share with you that I will be relocating to America in four months to pursue a three-year marketing business program at Harvard University. I'

Use synonyms

over the moon to commence

this

Linking Words

new chapter, and I trust that getting a part-time job would be a mesmerising way to enhance my experience. With my classes scheduled from 8:00 am to 10:00 pm, I will have sufficient time to dedicate to a part-time job. I'

Use synonyms

eager to receive work experience, expand my professional network, and make new friends. I believe that working part-time will not only complement my studies but

also

Linking Words

provide me with valuable skills and knowledge. I'd be grateful if you could aid me in finding an acceptable part-time job. I was wondering if you could reach out to your current manager to enquire about any available part-time positions that might be a first-rate fit for me. I'

Use synonyms

flexible and willing to work every day after my classes or even during weekends. I look forward to hearing from you and would appreciate any guidance or support you can offer. Best wishes, Arthur

omondavlat91Tue Jun 11 2024

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suitable writing tone

Try to ensure consistent and appropriate use of vocabulary. While 'mesmerising' is an interesting adjective, 'valuable' or 'enriching' might be more suitable for describing an experience. This can help the tone suit the context better.

logical structure

Consider breaking up longer sentences into shorter ones. For example: 'I'm eager to gain work experience. I also want to expand my professional network and make new friends.' This can enhance readability and clarity.

greeting and closing

The letter has a warm and personal opening and closing, which is very effective in a personal letter.

complete response

The letter provides all necessary details about study plans, reasons for wanting a part-time job, and how the friend can help. This ensures the task response is complete.

2
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

7 paragraphs

185 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Educational aspirations
Work experience
Financial independence
Resume (or CV)
Local job market
International student
Legal requirements
Student work permit
Employment trends
Time management
Networking
A part-time position
Balance studies and work
Job hunting strategies

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