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Band 7.5

Nowadays, many people have to work longer hours, and they feel more stressed out than before. What are the reasons? What can employers do to make their employees' lives easier?

#people #work #hours #employers #employees #lives
Recently, there has been an increase in
employees
' stress rate
due to
 the working hours increment in several companies. In
this
 essay, I will explore some possible factors and how we can prevent it from continuously happening in the future. Companies that are in an early stage of maturity are driven to gain the highest return on investments. They will be critically ambitious in terms of
target
.
Moreover
, they want to grow and reach
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 wider segment of customers,
hence
, the targets are usually impossible to reach within a short time. It is getting worsened by the unbalance between the resource capacity and the backlog.
As a result
, the
employees
 are pushed to work harder and have longer working hours. Another possible factor is the toxic working culture, which is commonly started by the leaders.
Although
 the company is mature enough and the
target
 is manageable, the bad managers will force their subordinates to do their responsibilities, which means, a person must do a double-job or even triple-job.
This
 condition surely influences the
employees
' well-being to be unfulfilled by the company. Those circumstances are severely stressful and can affect the
employees
' mental health.
Hence
, some workarounds and improvements must be applied by the employers.
First,
they should be aware of the situation and hire more resources to reach the
target
, capacity planning is the key to achieving that. They must ask each manager about the current work proportion within the team.
Second,
they should create a transparent performance review with a 360 method where the subordinates can give feedback to their managers anonymously.
Then
, the company must keep the anonymity and strictly give punishment to the bad leaders. In conclusion, longer working hours could occur because of a high
target
 supported by the lack of resources and toxic leaders with no responsibility.
Nevertheless
, it could be avoided and resolved with regular capacity planning and inclusive performance review.
Submitted by evaagustine11 on

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task achievement
While the essay addresses the question effectively and covers the reasons for increased working hours and stress, as well as solutions, incorporating more specific examples could strengthen your arguments. Providing real-world scenarios or referencing studies could add more depth.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each main point is elaborated upon with a clear topic sentence for each paragraph. This could enhance the logical flow of ideas. Additionally, refining the transition between paragraphs can improve coherence and cohesion.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear and concise introduction that sets the stage for the discussion.
logical structure
Each paragraph addresses a specific point, demonstrating a well-structured approach.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Burnout: A state of physical and emotional exhaustion often caused by prolonged stress.
  • Telecommuting: Working from a location outside of the traditional office environment, usually from home.
  • Work-life balance: The equilibrium between personal life and career work.
  • Flexible working hours: A system that allows employees to choose their working hours within certain limits.
  • Occupational wellbeing: The overall mental, physical, and emotional health of an individual in relation to their job.
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