Children do not respect their parents as much as they did in the past. This behaviour is now having a negative impact on society.’ Discuss. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Nowadays
children
haven't
Verb problem
aren't
concern
about their Change the verb form
concerned
parents
and they are refusing to follow the dignity
lifestyle as the ancient. Replace the word
dignified
These
type of attitude will ruin the Correct determiner usage
This
children
Change noun form
children's
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
as well as
the society in future.
Initially
, children
is
one of the beautiful Change the verb form
are
creation
of Fix the agreement mistake
creations
the
god Correct article usage
apply
also
their mind
Fix the agreement mistake
minds
is
like Correct subject-verb agreement
are
a clay
during their kinder age. Remove the article
clay
a lump of clay
Due to
technology development children
attitudes Change noun form
children's
are
changed and they are not Verb problem
have
compliance
with Replace the word
compliant
the
Change the word
their
parents
at present times. Additionally
, most of students
who are staying in the Add an article
the students
urbans
areas, Correct your spelling
urban
they
don't want to spend time with Correct pronoun usage
apply
the
Change the word
their
parents
during their leisure period. Because,
Remove the comma
apply
children
are thinking
Wrong verb form
think
parents
will raise bar
for their freedom, Add an article
the bar
thus
children
will try to keep distance
Correct pronoun usage
their distance
with
their Change preposition
from
parents
. To illustate
, Correct your spelling
illustrate
my
country most Change preposition
in my
of
Change preposition
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
children
are demanding
Wrong verb form
demand
separate
Correct article usage
a separate
bedroom
from their Fix the agreement mistake
bedrooms
parents
even the
Change the word
their
parents
due to
this
the relationship chain between parents
and children
will be broken.
Furthermore
, some parents
are giving much
freedom to the Rephrase
too much
children
these activities will indulge the children
in to
wrong behaviour. Change preposition
apply
Although
,
Remove the comma
apply
parents
also
sometimes behave stricktly
to their Correct your spelling
strictly
children
, otherwise
the children
don't have courtesy on their parents
. Also
, they will not become a good person in the future.
Eventually, children
is
a gift from Change the verb form
are
the
god and they have to respect their Correct article usage
apply
parents
in
all Change preposition
at
time
. Whilst, Fix the agreement mistake
times
parents
also
should guide them in a proper manner. Before, most of the children
were given respect to the
Change the word
their
parents
but present
time these Change preposition
at present
attitides
are going down and Correct your spelling
attitudes
this
is not good for the country as well as
society.Submitted by smsundaram57 on
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coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, better organize and clearly separate your points into distinct paragraphs with clear topic sentences. Ensure each paragraph centers around a single main idea and uses linking words to connect your ideas smoothly.
task achievement
For a higher score in task response, ensure your essay fully addresses all parts of the prompt. Be sure to develop your ideas more completely, offering specific, relevant examples to support your points more effectively.
language proficiency
Work on enhancing your vocabulary and grammar accuracy. While minor errors are acceptable, frequent mistakes can make your writing less clear.
coherence cohesion
Your essay contains an introduction and a conclusion, which is essential for a well-structured response.
task achievement
Some of the main points you raised are relevant to the task and show an understanding of the issue presented.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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