IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people say that to benefit the development of a child, the mother and father should take parenting classes. To what extent you agree or disagree with this statement?

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Nowadays people pay more attention to the development of
children
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. They
always
Add a missing verb
are always
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concern
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concerned
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 about
the
Correct article usage
apply
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school
education
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, but family
education
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 is as important as school
education
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, so some people
advice
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advise
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parents
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 to take courses
for learning
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to learn
show examples
 how to treat their
children
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. I agree with
this
Linking Words
 idea since
Correct article usage
the behaviors
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behaviors
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behaviours
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 of
parents
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 can have a big influence on young generations. Taking parenting classes is a good way to learn how to be a parent. The relationship between
parents
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 and
children
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 is quite different from that between colleagues and
the friendship
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friends
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. It is the first time for new mothers and fathers to feed and educate a child. But a parenting teacher who has
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of
experiences
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experience
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 can teach them to get the parenting skills as soon as possible and avoid doing dangerous or incorrect things, which is beneficial to their
children
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.
For example
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,
parents
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 always say no during their
education
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,
however
Linking Words
, a professional teacher will suggest
them
Correct pronoun usage
they
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to
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apply
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say positive
words
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for encouraging
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to encourage
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children
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 to follow their requirements easily.
Besides
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, people can share their parenting experience with teachers and classmates and update the current interests of
children
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 and
newest
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the newest
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 educational methods.
For instance
Linking Words
,
children
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 like to use
hit
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his
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words
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 and make themselves look cool.
Parents
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 who can speak new
words
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 are likely
get
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to get
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 close to their
children
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. If they learn these
words
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 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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class, they may have a better relationship with their
children
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. In conclusion, I suggest all mothers and fathers
to
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apply
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attend parenting
class
Fix the agreement mistake
classes
show examples
 as well
,
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apply
show examples
 because they can be more understanding and communicative, which is good for their family
education
Use synonyms
.

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task response
The introduction is clear, but it could be more engaging by elaborating on why family education is crucial. Try to provide a more compelling hook.
coherence cohesion
Work on transitioning more smoothly between paragraphs and ideas. ensure each paragraph focuses on one main idea and links logically to the next one.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to strengthen your arguments and make them more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to minor grammatical errors and typographical mistakes to improve the overall readability of your essay.
task response
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and reiterates your stance clearly.
coherence cohesion
You maintain a clear and logical structure throughout the essay, making it easy to follow your argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • discipline techniques
  • conflict resolution
  • child development stages
  • parental confidence
  • unified approach
  • parenting roles
  • child-rearing
  • preventative measure
  • effective communication
  • common pitfalls
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