Some people think that living in big cities is bad for people's health.To what extent do you agree or disagree

#people #cities #health

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The issue of residing in metropolises which can have a negative influence on

residens’

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residents’

health

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has

heightend

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heightened

heighten

people

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’s attention recently.

While

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this

Linking Words

statement is valid to some extent, I would contend that I partially do not have a consensus with

this

Linking Words

idea. It is clear to note that not settling in urban

areas

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brings a wide range of benefits

for

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show examples

people

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’s

health

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care system. There are good justifications to implicate that

people

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cannot be impacted by

contaminated

Correct article usage

a contaminated

show examples

environment. One compelling example

for

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show examples

this

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could be that abundant cities are occupied with vehicles namely automobiles and motorcycles, which lead to an acceleration of carbon

footprint’s

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footprint

show examples

emission

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emissions

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compared to rural

areas

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. Most

people

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have to travel outside to do their

works

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work

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and

this

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harsh atmosphere can affect their

lung

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lungs

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and make it more difficult for them to

breathing

Wrong verb form

breathe

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thus

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, their respiratory system can

be worsen

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worsen

show examples

everyday

Replace the word

every day

show examples

Therefore

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, to handle

this

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problem,

people

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should switch from using those vehicles

than

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show examples

more environmentally-friendly

transports

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transport

show examples

such

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as electric cars or bicycles to keep

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

nature clean.

While

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the negative impacts of living in

metropolisis

Correct your spelling

metropolises

metropolis

metropolis is

can bring to

people

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’s

health

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are widely acknowledged, there are some tremendous effects that

people

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can miss out on if they do not reside in big cities. There are justifiable reasons to note that

people

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cannot get

immediately

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immediate

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access to the nearest hospital to

cure

Correct article usage

a cure

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when they have a bad disease. To be more precise, cities

are having

Wrong verb form

have

show examples

a wide range of hospitals and medical care systems with the most top-notch facilities, which can assist

people

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as soon as possible whenever they have

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

with their

health

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. For some

people

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who live in the countryside, it

is usually be

Change the verb form

is usually

show examples

more time-consuming for them to attend quickly to any medical care systems nearby as there is a small number of hospitals in those places.

Therefore

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, residing in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

urban

areas

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can

Verb problem

make it

show examples

easier for

people

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to cure their

disease

Fix the agreement mistake

diseases

show examples

as possible to prevent them

for

Change preposition

from

show examples

being worsen

Change the verb form

worsening

show examples

. In conclusion, settling in metropolises can cause some negative impacts on citizens’

health

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however

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, they can get access to advanced facilities of medical

system

Fix the agreement mistake

systems

show examples

for the sake of their

health

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if they

chose

Wrong verb form

choose

show examples

to live in urban

areas

Use synonyms

Submitted by hominhtrang995 on Sat Jun 15 2024

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task achievement

Your response covers the prompt adequately, but it could be enhanced by addressing more specific counterarguments. Providing well-rounded examples and demonstrating critical thinking in reflecting on opposing views can further strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

The flow of the essay is fairly good, but it can be improved. Consider using more cohesive devices to ensure smoother transitions between ideas. Additionally, ensure each paragraph maintains a single clear main idea which is explicitly linked to your main argument.

general

A few grammatical and lexical errors are present. Reviewing concord, tense usage, and word choice could improve the overall quality of your essay. Regular practice and feedback can help hone these areas.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helps in maintaining coherence.

task achievement

The examples provided are relevant and help in supporting your main points effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

6.5

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

6.5

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

6.5

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

363 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

respiratory problems
population density
stress levels
mental health issues
sedentary lifestyles
healthcare facilities
cardiovascular diseases
psychological well-being
recreational areas
social networks

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Some people think that living in big cities is bad for people's health.To what extent do you agree or disagree

Fully explain your ideas

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Ins some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?