MamadjonovSamandar: Topic: Many doctors are concerned about the high use of computer games by children and young people. Task: what are the advantages and disadvantages of children playing computer games?

#mamadjonovsamandar #topic #doctors #computer #games #children #people

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Health

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experts are worried about the high usage of

games

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computer

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computers

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played by kids and young adults. Major

benefits

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this

Linking Words

are improving cognitive

skills

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educational

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and educational

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benefits

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and drawbacks are

health

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problems

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and negative impact on socializing.

This

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essay will discuss

about

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apply

show examples

these

benefits

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and drawbacks in detail on

this

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topic. Gaming can have a significant impact on children and adults. One of the

advantage

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advantages

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is that

games

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can improve a person's cognitive abilities

such

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as critical thinking,

problem solving

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problem-solving

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and hand-eye coordination.

This

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is because when playing a game, the player needs to use their thinking and solve the levels, as the levels increase the difficulty

also

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rises improving their cognitive

skills

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. Another benefit

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gaming is educational

benefits

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, where they teach different subjects in

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show examples

engaging way. Computer

games

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can help kids and young adults understand subjects like maths, science and history in

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engaging way, making

learninf

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learning

fun and interactive.

A prolonged

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Prolonged

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gaming on

desktop

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the desktop

a desktop

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can have a negative impact on the players. A major drawback is the

health

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problems

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such

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as neck pain, obesity, poor posture and eye strain. These

problems

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are caused because when

people

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play

games

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they tend to sit

infront

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in front

of the computer for a long time without much movement for

there

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their

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body. Another disadvantage can be

inability

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the inability

an inability

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to socialize with

people

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and

being

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part of

the

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apply

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society.

This

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due to

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the time spent indoors playing

games

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rather than interacting with

people

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and making friends.

For example

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, there is

study

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a study

the study

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conducted in the United States which examines the socializing

skills

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the

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apply

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teenagers in the country. The results say that

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apply

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around 30% among 55% of the

people

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who struggled to socialize are gamers who

plays

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play

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for a couple of hours in a day. In conclusion, the advantages of gaming which are the cognitive

skills

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and educational

benefits

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outweigh the disadvantages

that is

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health

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problems

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and

problems

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with socializing. But is

impotant

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important

to note that, there

needs

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need

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to be a balance and time limits for these

games

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. As we already know anything used

excessive

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excessively

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can

problems

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Submitted by Devika on Sun Jun 16 2024

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task achievement

While the essay covers both advantages and disadvantages of children playing computer games, it could benefit from a more balanced approach. Ensure that both sides are equally detailed for a more comprehensive analysis.

coherence cohesion

Work on refining the topic sentences in each paragraph to ensure that the main points are clear and concise. This will help set the stage for more detailed explanations and examples.

task achievement

Try to provide more specific and varied examples to support your points. Currently, the essay relies heavily on general assertions. Specific data or studies can add weight to your arguments.

task achievement

Be mindful of minor grammatical mistakes and typos, such as 'og' instead of 'of' and 'learninf' instead of 'learning.' While they do not significantly affect the clarity, they can be distracting. Proofreading can help mitigate these issues.

coherence cohesion

The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph addresses a specific aspect of the topic, which aids readability.

coherence cohesion

The introduction effectively sets up the advantages and disadvantages that will be discussed, providing a clear roadmap for the reader.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion succinctly summarizes the main points of the essay and offers a balanced view, emphasizing the importance of moderation in gaming.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – advantages
Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

The main advantage is...
The disadvantage of this...
The main benefit...
Despite these advantages...
One possible drawback...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

344 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

cognitive skills
problem-solving
strategic thinking
hand-eye coordination
mental agility
critical thinking
educational purposes
interactive learning
multiplayer games
teamwork
communication skills
sedentary lifestyle
obesity
poor posture
repetitive strain injuries
mental health
addiction
anxiety
depression
social withdrawal
academic performance
family relationships
inappropriate content
behavioral effects

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MamadjonovSamandar: Topic: Many doctors are concerned about the high use of computer games by children and young people. Task: what are the advantages and disadvantages of children playing computer games?

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

The rate of unemployment in some countries is high. Because of this, there is no need to complete an education beyond a primary school level. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people believe that team sports prepare children for their future careers while others do not agree.

These days, mobile phones and the internet are very important to the ways in which people relate to one another socially. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?