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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The two pie charts below show total world energy consumption and electricity generation for last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The two pie charts below show total world energy consumption and electricity generation for last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#two #show #world #energy #consumption #electricity #generation #year #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The two pie chart
display
Change the verb form
displays
show examples
 the comparison of the total
energy
 consumption and the
electricity
generation
 in the
pervious
Correct your spelling
previous
show examples
 year.
According to
 the data, coal was the biggest source of
electricity
generation
,
while
 oil
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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consumed the most of
world
Change noun form
world's
show examples
energy
 usage, which was significantly higher than
electricity
generation
. Notably, Gas represented less than 1% of change in both categories. Combustible renewable&waste was not used for
electricity
generation
. 34.4% of global
energy
 was sourced
by
Change preposition
from
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 oil, which was the highest proportion of total world's
energy
Correct word choice
total energy
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 consumption. Coal and Gas grabbed the second and the third at 25.1% and 20.9%.
In other
Change preposition
Other
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 sources,
such
 as combustible renewable&waste, nuclear, hydro and
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
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, ranged from 10.6% to 0.4%. For
electricity
generation
, coal accounted for 39.8% of
world's
Correct article usage
the world's
show examples
 power production, which was higher than the consumption of coal. Gas was the second highest
electricity
 generated source. Hydro and Nuclear showed nearly a similar proportion of
electricity
generation
, at 16.1% and 15.7% respectively.
However
, only 6% of
oil
Add an article
the oil
show examples
 was used in
electricity
generation
, which was far lower than
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
global
energy
 usage.
Submitted by bhavifasai on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, electricity, generation with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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