Many people are using credit cards or loans to run up huge personal debts that they may be unable to repay. It should therefore be made more difficult for the individuals to borrow large amounts of money. What are your opinions on this?
We live in an age when many of us are dependent on
credits
cards or other Change the noun form
credit
loans
to manage our day to day
expenses. Most of the time people would not be able to pay them on time and they indulge in more and more Add a hyphen
day-to-day
debts
. Moreover
, it is hard for everyone to get big credit
in future. The folowing
paragraphs discuss whether Correct your spelling
following
using
Change the verb form
to use
credit
money or not and reach a reasonable conclusion.
First of all, more people do not have enough financial knowledge, they misuse the
Correct article usage
apply
credit
cards and loans
to pay their expense
which Fix the agreement mistake
expenses
leading
to enormous Wrong verb form
leads
debts
. Furthermore
, high personal debts
can have detrimental effects on mental health and overall
well-being, making it challenging for many individuals
to lead normal lives. Additionally
, with the access of
easy money available, no one Change preposition
to
think
about the repayment of Change the verb form
thinks
credits
and they just increase their Fix the agreement mistake
credit
spendings
and end up paying more Fix the agreement mistake
spending
interests
and even face low Fix the agreement mistake
interest
credit
score
for future borrowings.
Fix the agreement mistake
scores
Lets
explore some of the measures which Replace the word
Let's
Let us
needs
to be taken by the Change the verb form
need
credit
unions and agencies so they just provide the credit
to those who are able to pay back. On top of that, financial institutions should implement stringent checks and balances to ensure that individuals
are capable of repaying loans
and credit
card debts
. Regulations can be put in place to cap the amount of credit
available to individuals
based on their income and existing financial commitments. Moreover
, banks and credit
agencies should provide them mandatory
financial Change preposition
with mandatory
educationbefore
granting large Correct your spelling
education before
loans
which can empower individuals
to make better financial decisions.
To conclude
, it is clear that
immediate action is necessary to tackle the issue effectively. Banks and other credit
agencies put
Verb problem
take
Fix the agreement mistake
steps
step
to first educate the Fix the agreement mistake
steps
individuals
and then
access Correct your spelling
the
them
Correct your spelling
the
Change preposition
to smaller
smaller
Change preposition
to smaller
credit
available,
if the person Remove the comma
apply
use
their rights wisely Change the verb form
uses
then
they provide them big credits.Submitted by hazel@ on
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coherence cohesion
You have done well in structuring your essay with an introduction and conclusion. However, try to clearly state your opinion in the introduction and ensure that each body paragraph directly supports this opinion. This will improve your logical structure and help to make your ideas more clear and comprehensive.
task achievement
Your essay would benefit from more specific examples and clearer explanations to support your main points. This will help to strengthen your argument and provide a more complete response to the question.
task achievement
Although you have addressed the task and provided some relevant points, try to avoid generalizations and focus on explaining your points more thoroughly. This will help in making your response more clear and comprehensive.
coherence cohesion
Your essay includes both an introduction and a conclusion, which is essential for a well-structured essay.
task achievement
You have addressed the prompt and discussed potential solutions, which shows a complete response to the task.
task achievement
Your points about the detrimental effects of debt and the need for financial education are very relevant to the task. These are strong main points that enhance your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.