IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Some people believe that women should be treated as equal to men when applying for a job with the police or the military. Others think that women are less suitable for this kind of job. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In recent years,
women
Use synonyms
 should be treated as equal to
men
Use synonyms
 when applying for
job
Correct article usage
a job
show examples
 with the police or the
military
Punctuation problem
military,
show examples
 believe
by
Change preposition
to
show examples
 some
people
Use synonyms
. In my opinion,
women
Use synonyms
 are weak and not good at
use
Replace the word
using
show examples
 power.
However
Linking Words
, if they train
Use the right word
every day
show examples
everyday
Punctuation problem
everyday,
show examples
 they will be stronger
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
women
Use synonyms
 should be treated as
equal
Replace the word
equals
show examples
 to
men
Use synonyms
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, one cause of
think
Wrong verb form
thinking
show examples
 that
women
Use synonyms
 are less suitable is weak
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 is the main reason
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 think
this
Linking Words
cause
Check wording
way
show examples
.
That is
Linking Words
 because it is
general
Correct article usage
the general
show examples
 thinking of
people
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 in the way of
science
Punctuation problem
science,
show examples
 the scientists always say
men
Use synonyms
 are stronger than
women
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 everyone
say
Correct subject-verb agreement
says
show examples
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
men
Use synonyms
 need to take
cake
Use the right word
care
show examples
Use synonyms
women
Change preposition
of women
show examples
 or protect them.
For example
Linking Words
,
men
Use synonyms
 are good at
use
Replace the word
using
show examples
 power
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
women
Use synonyms
 aren’t.
However
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 everyone must
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
have human rights and have
freedom
Correct article usage
the freedom
show examples
 to choose or have something.
This
Linking Words
 is
due to
Linking Words
 the fact that it has
law
Fix the agreement mistake
laws
show examples
 and
treaty
Fix the agreement mistake
treaties
show examples
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
gender
Use synonyms
 equality. Every
gender
Use synonyms
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
show examples
 to get equality
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 they are all treated the same
whether
Punctuation problem
, whether
show examples
 they are male or female.
For instance
Linking Words
, LGBTQ
must
Check wording
people must
show examples
 have
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 treatment as every
gender
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, some
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
 think
women
Use synonyms
 and
men
Use synonyms
 should be treated as
equal
Replace the word
equals
show examples
 when applying for jobs with the police or military
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 other
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
 think that
women
Use synonyms
 are less suitable.
People
Use synonyms
 think
women
Use synonyms
 aren’t stronger than
men
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
science
Replace the word
scientific
show examples
 way think the same as that.
Lastly
Linking Words
, everyone
or
Use the right word
of
show examples
Use synonyms
gender
Correct determiner usage
every gender
show examples
 must have the same treatment.

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content
Make your view clear in the start. Say what you think and keep it.
content
Give equal talk for both sides. Do not only show one side.
structure
Use one idea per paragraph. Start each with a simple line about what you will say.
grammar
Use simple grammar and fix common errors. Short, clear sentences are better.
content
Only use facts or general ideas that fit the task. Do not add ideas that are not asked.
editing
Check your spelling and word use. Correct mistakes that change meaning.
content
There is an attempt to talk about both views.
structure
There is an introduction and a conclusion.
cohesion
Some link words show how ideas go together.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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