The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

#process #sugar #cane #summarise #information #features #comparisons

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The diagram clearly demonstrates the

process

Use synonyms

by which

sugar

Use synonyms

is made from

sugar

Use synonyms

cane.

Overall

Linking Words

, it is evident that the

process

Use synonyms

contains 7 stages, three of which take place in a farmland and others in a manufacture.

To begin

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the

process

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sugar

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canes are cultivated for 12-18 months in farmlands before harvesting. As for the second step, canes are harvested either by agricultural machinery or by hand.

Subsequently

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, the harvested material is transferred to a manufacturer to continue the

process

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. Looking at the third stage, canes are put in a crushing machine, making them crushed and turned into juice. For the fourth step, the juice is purified by going through a limestone filter. After making syrup out of the purified juice by an evaporator,

sugar

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crystals in the syrup are

then

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separated by a centrifuge. To complete the procedure,

sugar

Use synonyms

is dried and cooled down, after which it is ready for consumption.

Submitted by bita.rezaei7052 on Sat Jun 22 2024

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words process, sugar with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Only 1 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

152 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

manufacturing process
sugar cane
harvesting
transporting
factory
crushing
extracting
juice
filtering
impurities
heating
evaporating
syrup
boiling
crystallizing
sugar
separating
drying
packaging
distribution
stage
process

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