IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people's coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people's coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The bar graph demonstrated
outcome
Add an article
the outcome
show examples
 of a survey
how
Change preposition
of how
show examples
 people consume
coffee
Use synonyms
 and tea as a habit in five Australian cities in
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 4 weeks. At first glance, most citizens of Australia
tended
Wrong verb form
tend
show examples
 to go to a cafe for tea or
coffee
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
 the number of people buying fresh and instant
coffee
Use synonyms
 remained a minor consuming. On the one hand, more than half of city residents in 4 four cities including Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane and Hobart savoured
coffee
Use synonyms
 and tea at a cafe. Among them, the highest percentage being in Melbourne and Hobart, accounting for a little below 65%.
Moreover
Linking Words
, just slightly under 60%
urban
Change preposition
of urban
show examples
 residents in Adelaide went to a cafe in
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 4 weeks.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
amount
Correct article usage
the amount
show examples
 of consuming fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
 in five cities
made up
Verb problem
was
show examples
 below 50%. City dwellers bought instant
coffee
Use synonyms
 between 45% and 55%. Instant
coffee
Use synonyms
 reached a peak at approximately 55% in Hobart

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words coffee with synonyms.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • survey
  • coffee
  • tea
  • buying habits
  • drinking habits
  • Australian cities
  • consumption
  • respondents
  • regular
  • participants
  • levels
  • observed
  • popular
What to do next:
Look at other essays: