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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the value of one country's exports various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of eports in compared with 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevent.

The chart below shows the value of one country's exports various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of eports in compared with 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevent.
#value #country #exports #categories #percentage #change #category #eports #summarise #information #features #comparisons #relevent
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In the
Change preposition
The
show examples
 bar graph, displays the nation's
earning
Fix the agreement mistake
earnings
show examples
 in the five different categories in the shipment
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
abroad in
Use synonyms
Change the article
the year
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year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
 2015 and 2016. In overview, petroleum
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 increased gradually
3
Change preposition
by 3
show examples
% in 2016, which was the
least
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
 percentage of grossing after the agriculture
products
Use synonyms
 in comparison of all sections. Meanwhile, the textile
products
Use synonyms
accelerate
Wrong verb form
accelerated
show examples
 with 15.24% of
sellings
Correct your spelling
selling
show examples
 in a
year
Use synonyms
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 was the highest bounce back amongst all the
products
Use synonyms
. In 2015 and 2016,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
petoleum
Correct your spelling
petroleum
products
Use synonyms
 and engineered goods
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 the highest
contributers
Correct your spelling
contributors
contributor
 in export, roughly,
sum
Add an article
the sum
a sum
show examples
 of both categories
add
Wrong verb form
added
show examples
 more than 50% of the selling
that is
Linking Words
 100 billion dollars. Other than that, gems and jewellery contribute as the third highest selling sector
that is
Linking Words
upto
Correct your spelling
up to
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 40 billion
although
Linking Words
, in next
year
Use synonyms
 it retard by 5.18%.
Likewise
Linking Words
, the other two compartments are minor participants
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
sells
Correct your spelling
sales
show examples
that is
Linking Words
 farming
products
Use synonyms
 and cloth division.
Moreover
Linking Words
, agronomy goods grow trading by 0.81% but,
fabric
Correct article usage
the fabric
show examples
 segment
accelerate
Change the verb form
accelerates
show examples
transaction
Fix the agreement mistake
transactions
show examples
 by 15.24% in
second
Change the article
the second
show examples
 term which is the highest development amid other
categorization
Fix the agreement mistake
categorizations
show examples
. In conclusion, every group expanded their deals except gems and jewellery. Meanwhile, fuel
products
Use synonyms
 and scheme goods were the largest contributors and
clothing
Correct article usage
the clothing
show examples
 department
have
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 the highest improvement in a
year
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by rohanshingala7781 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "that is".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words year, products with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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