Nowadays, personal growth of children is one of the important subjects, besides, people consider the way of development of their loved ones; some people believe learning at home is the better way while others think go to school is essential for all people. In This essay both views will be discussed.
On the
one
hand
a group of individuals believe teaching offspring at Add a comma
hand,
school
is necessary. The most important one
is learning at school
can help children
to adapt themselves with
society for the future. Change preposition
to
For instance
, some
Correct your spelling
someone
one
who has lived in
Change preposition
at
home
for all of his or her lifetime
is not ready to live in society because there are many types of people and he or she is not ready to meet them without any Replace the word
life
experiences
. Fix the agreement mistake
experience
Second,
children
need to have friends and social relation
but it is scarce at Fix the agreement mistake
relations
home
so they can not communicate with any
Correct your spelling
anyone
one
; in Fix the agreement mistake
addition
additions
Add a comma
additions,
this
subject can have effect
on Add an article
an effect
minds
of the offspring. Correct article usage
the minds
Therefore
, going to school
and learning there has many benefits.
However
, on the other hand
, some people think child’s
development at Correct article usage
a child’s
home
is the best way. Furthermore
, they believe learning at home
is more professional than school
because classes are privet and Change preposition
in school
children
have complete communication with teachers. Also
, they can ask any questions and solve their problems easier. In addition
, in this
method offspring do not have to communicate with rude children
; Therefore
, they turn to the
polite and educated people.
In Correct article usage
apply
conclusions
, in my Fix the agreement mistake
conclusion
opinion
none Add the comma(s)
opinion,
these
statements are wrong but Change preposition
of these
according to
Correct article usage
the corona
corona virus
Correct your spelling
coronavirus
epidemy
experiences, educating at Correct your spelling
epidemic
home
without meeting friends is too boring; furthermore
, lack of social connections causes depression, besides
, this
issue influences on level
of understanding in classes. Add an article
the level
Therefore
, teaching children
at school
is the best method of educating
.Replace the word
education
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task achievement
To achieve a higher score, focus on expanding your ideas with more detailed examples and explanations. This will enhance the depth of your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical flow between your paragraphs. Using more transitional phrases can help connect your ideas better and improve overall coherence.
language
Pay attention to grammar and minor errors such as capitalization and punctuation mistakes. Refining these will make your writing more polished.
task achievement
The essay effectively covers both viewpoints, which is a good approach for a balanced discussion.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present and provide a clear framework for the essay.
content
The points presented are relevant and valid, particularly the emphasis on social adaptation and the personalized attention offered through home schooling.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.