Many goods including what we use on daily basis produced by other countries need to be transported from a long distance.To what extent Do the advantages outweigh disadvantages

#goods #basis #countries #distance

Our daily purchases that are mainly produced by foreign countries need to be supplied from a long distance.

Although

this

tendency has certain drawbacks, I believe that

advantages

Correct pronoun usage

its advantages

show examples

surpass its disadvantages. On the one hand, transporting goods from abroad requires sophisticated vehicles which can carry all

products

without being ruined or spoiled. Obviously,

this

process increases the cost of shipped goods

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

make

Correct subject-verb agreement

makes

show examples

them unaffordable to ordinary citizens.

Therefore

, there is a chance that those

products

will be less attractive to buyers and lead importers to loss.

In addition

, it is highly probable that there are certain

products

that can be easily damaged before even reaching the final destination regardless of how advanced the transport means are.

This

can deter people from acquiring

those

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

products

they desire and lead them to common dissatisfaction.

Conversly

Correct your spelling

Conversely

increased

Correct article usage

the increased

show examples

cost of goods imported from overseas can act as a great incentive for local suppliers to produce the

substitudes

Correct your spelling

substitutes

of unavailable foreign

products

This

can undoubtedly increase the level of production within the country which might contribute to

overall

Add an article

the overall

show examples

development of the economy.

Furthermore

improved

Add an article

an improved

the improved

show examples

economic system

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

full of businesses that are crucial for consumers' well-being,

also

means more job opportunities for citizens and

less

Correct quantifier usage

fewer

show examples

unemployed people. Thanks to

this

tendency, countries might reform their strategies

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

take initiatives to be self-supplied, and devise new methods and solutions to raise

efficiency

Correct article usage

the efficiency

show examples

and effectiveness of the production processes.

To conclude

, I have to admit that despite possessing obvious disadvantages, I believe that

advantages

Correct article usage

the advantages

show examples

outweigh the drawbacks since they pave the way for

Add an article

a more

show examples

sustainable and fully developed economy.

Submitted by Dinare Abdullayeva on Mon Jun 24 2024

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task achievement

Your essay provides a clear response to the task prompt and covers both advantages and disadvantages effectively. To enhance the answer, aim to incorporate more specific examples to illustrate your points.

coherence cohesion

While your ideas are coherent and logically structured, a few transition phrases can improve the flow between paragraphs. Consider using words like 'moreover' or 'furthermore' to link your points smoothly.

introduction conclusion present

Your introduction and conclusion are both clear and effectively frame the essay.

supported main points

The arguments presented are logical and support the main thesis well.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

264 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many goods including what we use on daily basis produced by other countries need to be transported from a long distance.To what extent Do the advantages outweigh disadvantages

Fully explain your ideas

Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are a important to a child's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There is a controversial perspective heating up a debate about whether people have the right to attend college so the governor should cover the tuition waiving. Meanwhile, from in my point of view, I do not consider myself an advocate of this idea.

I didn't have any nightmare travel experiences, but my friend has had such an experience.

In many countries nowadays,consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

In some countries, many more people are choosing to live alone nowadays than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative?