In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#countries #world #people #cities #population #countryside #development

Nowadays, some

people

prefer to live in the cities. Many

people

believe that they could get a lot of opportunities

such

job

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a job

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the central area. I think that

this

is a negative development because everyone in the country should get the same opportunities wherever they live. First of all, the main reason the population choose to move to the town is the limited access that you can get

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the villages compared to the metropolitan area. In the cities, you could find

the

Correct article usage

apply

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employment more easily, create new potential businesses, and study at the best schools in the country.

Additionally

, the differences

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technology

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are

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also

the

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apply

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significant.

This

condition is not ideal for the communities because it will make the city more crowded. The government should think of strategic initiatives to develop small cities in every

aspects

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aspect

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. They could help give incentives to

people

who want to run

Correct article usage

apply

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small

business

Fix the agreement mistake

businesses

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, so

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they

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can create new workplaces. The development of technology in the countryside,

such

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the internet

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internet

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the internet

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, will

also

boost

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apply

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the

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apply

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economic growth.

Therefore

, the public doesn't have to move to the downtown. In conclusion, I believe that the movement of some

people

from the villages to downtown is a bad thing. The public obligation should try to execute some ideas to keep the balance of it.

Submitted by vito.naufal on Mon Jun 24 2024

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task achievement

While the essay's main ideas are clear, there should be a more detailed development of arguments with specific examples or data to support the points made. For example, mentioning specific countries experiencing rural-urban migration or actual government initiatives would strengthen the argument.

coherence cohesion

Better transitions between paragraphs could improve the flow of the essay. For example, the second paragraph jumps to ideas without smooth transitions from the introduction.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which help to frame the argument well.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of the essay is sound, with a clear thesis statement followed by supporting points.

task achievement

The response addresses the task well, providing arguments both against and for the movement from rural areas to cities.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

220 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

rural-to-urban migration
population shift
positive impact
negative impact
urbanization
job opportunities
access to education
access to healthcare
urban infrastructure
rural traditions
cultural heritage

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In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

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In many countries, plastic shopping bags are the main source of rubbish. They cause water and land pollution, and so they should be banned. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

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