Money spent on space exploration is a complete waste. Governments could better spend this money on other things to benefit the nation. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Governments spend a lot of
money
on
researches
Fix the agreement mistake
research
show examples
about
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
space
. Many
people
oppose
this
as they say it is
waste
Correct article usage
a waste
show examples
of
money
, they believe
this
money
could be used for far more important things
that
Correct word choice
than
show examples
space
exploration. In
this
essay, I will discuss
this
view and give reasons why I agree with
this
view.
Space
exploration
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
not important because they do not contribute to our daily lives as ordinary citizens. All we need is good services from the local Ministries
such
as education, health and industry. I believe that pace exploration is a luxury and it should be the
last
thing to venture into until
people
are able to afford a decent life. Going to
space
is all about proving power as countries battle to showcase their talent in technology. In recent years Elon Mask has been one of the leading tech giants navigating the
space
. They build
space ships
Correct your spelling
spaceships
show examples
to visit the moon, these are only for wealthy
people
.
For
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
Elon Mask wants to build a village at the moon so he will be selling land to some rich
people
who want to live there.
This
shows that
people
have
money
to waste on luxury things
while
other
people
are suffering in poor countries like
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Africa. In
Africa
Add a comma
Africa,
show examples
people
are struggling to access clean water, nutritious food and medication but some
government
Fix the agreement mistake
governments
show examples
, and certain individuals are spending
money
going to Mars
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task achievement
Your essay presents a clear position on the topic and provides some arguments to support your view. However, you should include more detailed examples and elaborate on each point to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion. While your essay starts with a clear introduction, it lacks a proper conclusion. Summarize your main points and restate your position in the conclusion to give the essay a sense of completeness.
coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas logically. Your essay would benefit from having distinct paragraphs for each main point. This would help in making your arguments clearer and easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
The essay begins with a clear introduction that states your position on the topic.
task achievement
You have identified and explained some relevant points regarding the drawbacks of spending money on space exploration.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • complete waste
  • benefit the nation
  • technological advancements
  • foster
  • international cooperation
  • inspire
  • engage
  • boost the economy
  • long-term benefits
What to do next:
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