It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behivour to children?

Positive and negative feedbacks have to be implemented in young people in order to show them the importance of having appropriate behaviours and the consequences of having those that are
inappropiate
Correct your spelling
inappropriate
.
Then
, I staunchly believe that
children
and youngsters should be rewarded and punished
according
Add the preposition
according to
show examples
their performances, respectively. In
this
essay, I will explain my reasons in detail and how the
proffesors
Correct your spelling
professors
and parents should manage the
punishments
. To start with, teachers and parents are considered authority figures who should be respected by humankind.
Thus
, they are in
charged
Change the form of the verb
charge
show examples
of teaching not only
children
but adolescents all manners, ethics, and values which should be fulfilled in order to be part of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
As a consequence
of
this
, many debates have been carried out to establish the proper education people should receive
as well as
whether
punishments
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
are required from
early
Correct article usage
an early
show examples
ages
Fix the agreement mistake
age
show examples
.
Then
,
pyshologists
Correct your spelling
psychologists
physiologists
and sociologists have proved that the most crucial range of age for teaching
behivours
Correct your spelling
behaviours
and patterns is between 1 and 5 years old because of the development of the brain.
Therefore
, some penalties should be implemented as a way to show the impact
on having
Verb problem
of
show examples
bad actions.
Additionally
, types of
punishments
to be performed among schools and households have been set by
goverments
Correct your spelling
governments
government
in order to establish boundaries and avoid severe actions.
Then
,
it is clear that
not only physical but
also
pyshological
Correct your spelling
psychological
violence
are
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is
show examples
forbidden.
Besides
, in case of
consider
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considering
show examples
punishments
as a unique way of teaching, they have to be proportional to the age and the action that was committed.
For instance
, parents could restrict the usage of technological devices or social
medial
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media
show examples
, or
children
cannot stay outside with their
friend
Fix the agreement mistake
friends
show examples
unless they accomplish all
homework
Correct pronoun usage
their homework
show examples
.
Conversely
,
proffesors
Correct your spelling
professors
should implement community service
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
those who have no respect and empathy.
To sum up
, it is well-known and it has been proved that
children
should be taught from early stages to respect and follow the rules.
Nevertheless
, many characteristics should be taken into account to establish fair
punishments
by teaching the importance of having proper behaviours.
Submitted by luciaagudelomotta on

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task achievement
Ensure that arguments are supported with relevant examples or details. For instance, elaborate on specific situations where punishments have led to positive behavior changes.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetitive phrases and try to use a variety of sentence structures to improve the overall readability of the essay.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear opinion and reasons for the position taken, which shows a good grasp of the task.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are clearly present and help frame the arguments effectively.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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