Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal informatoin, such as their hobbies and interests, and wheteher they are married or single. some people say tha this information may be releveant and useful. other disagree. discuss both views amd give your own opinioon
#employers #people #jobs #informatoin #hobbies #interests #wheteher #tha #information #releveant #amd #opinioon
There is no doubt that these days everybody is competing
applying
Change the verb form
to apply
into
jobs. The question is, is it useful to request the Change preposition
for
candidtants
Correct your spelling
candidates
providing
their personal Wrong verb form
provide
information
? In this
essay, I am going to discuss my view and draw my personal conclusion.
In terms of positive
side, by taking Add an article
the positive
these personal
Change the determiner
this personal information
information
in
account Change preposition
into
such
as hobbies and preferences, they could give the employer
a perspective about the skills that the candidate has. For instance
, If one of the candidates enjoying
drawing and painting , he or she might be creative and think in a way different from others. So that, Wrong verb form
enjoys
this
would influence the efficiency of the field that they belong to it. Furthermore
, when the employer
accept
an application for one , he or she might Change the verb form
accepts
be
get the insurance that the Unnecessary verb
apply
employer
provide
for his employees. To illustrate, they could benefit from Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
the
insurance in healthcare Correct article usage
apply
centers
and buying the necessary things with special discounts. Change the spelling
centres
For example
, If a person purchases a device from Extra he or she would get 20
% discount.
Correct article usage
a 20
However
, these
Change the determiner
this information
information
when it has been seen it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
effect
Correct your spelling
affects
on
the privacy of the candidate. The main reason to support Change preposition
apply
this
claim is a lots
of people do not like to be like an open book read by anybody. Change the noun form
lot
Moreover
, the stability uncertainty when one employee decide
to leave Change the verb form
decides
the
work. In Correct article usage
apply
other word
, It could cost the Change the wording
another word
other words
employer
regarding the insurance provided.
In conclusion, the
personal Correct article usage
apply
information
has drawbacks that effect
both sides which are the Correct your spelling
affect
applier
and Replace the word
applicant
employer
. Correct article usage
the employer
Therefore
, I believe that those
Change the determiner
that information
information
very useful for deciding Add a verb
information is
information was
selection
of employees.Add an article
the selection
Submitted by sarah3bdullahm397 on
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task achievement
Your essay provides a clear response to the task, but it lacks enough specific examples to fully support your points.
task achievement
You should work on developing your points more fully. It would be beneficial to elaborate on your ideas and provide more detailed examples.
coherence cohesion
While your essay has a logical structure, the flow of ideas could be improved. Try to use more cohesive devices to link your points and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to syntax and grammar - some sentences are awkward or contain errors. This can distract the reader from your main points.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which gives your essay a good structure.
task achievement
You have addressed both sides of the argument, which shows that you can see different perspectives on the issue.