IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people think that universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace in the future. Others think the true function of a university is to provide access to knowledge for its own sake. What do you think are the main functions of a university?

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Universities play a key role in the job market. It has become a subject of concern whether or not graduates should be trained to acquire employment
skills
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 at tertiary institutions or they should be left to learn whilst working. I am of the view that universities should offer both
knowledge
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 and
skills
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 to their students.
To begin
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 with,
firstly
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 a university serves as the highest level of education which creates the forum for
people
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 to learn to
take
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make
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lifechanging
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life-changing
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 decisions.
For instance
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, most
people
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 who go to the university live away from home. They become responsible for their accommodation, meals and utility bills.
This
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 encourages individuals to plan how to manage their individual affairs. By so doing, they acquire the ability to make decisions on their own as they become responsible for the consequences.
Also
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, the differing
background
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backgrounds
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 of several
people
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 inculcates the ability to learn social
skills
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.
Thus
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,
people
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 are left with no option
than
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but
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 to learn to live with others as everyone behaves as they please.
Lastly
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, tertiary institutions
offers
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offer
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knowledge
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 to students by competent tutors in a particular field to enable the learners
become
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to become
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 capable
to handle
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of handling
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 tasks in a particular field.
However
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, during the working experience, they may face problems which will require a person who has had a similar experience in the past to help solve
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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such
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. In view of
this
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, most companies send out job offers requesting
people
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 with experience. Typically, individuals leaving university only acquire
knowledge
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 but no
skills
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 from school.
This
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 makes it difficult for them to qualify for the recruiting criteria for lots of employing firms.
For instance
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 in Ghana, several graduates from tertiary institutions are jobless
whereas
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 a higher percentage of persons with
skills
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 have jobs.
Hence
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, higher levels of education should be encouraged to teach students the
skills
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 they will need
on
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in
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 their desired jobs. In conclusion, universities have several roles. The main of which is impacting
knowledge
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 and generating socially oriented individuals who can
take
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make
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 decisions on their own.

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task achievement
The essay is relevant and addresses the prompt effectively. However, there is a need to refine the ideas presented throughout to ensure specific, relevant examples and clearer comprehensive arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure paragraphs are coherent and ideas smoothly transition from one to another. For instance, linking the points about personal responsibilities at university and developing social skills would enhance the flow.
task achievement
While the essay covered significant roles of universities, the argument would benefit from a deeper exploration of how skills can be integrated into the higher education curriculum. This would strengthen the argument about employment skills.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which succinctly addresses the topic.
coherence cohesion
Main points are supported with examples. This strengthens the author's arguments and makes the points credible.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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