IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You are renting a flat from an agency. Your contract was for one year but you need to leave the flat two months early.

#agency #contract #year #two #months
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Dear Sir/Madam, I am writing
this
 letter regarding my flat contract. I understand that I signed a one-year contract for my flat that ends in September 2025.
However
,
due to
 a family emergency, I will have to go back to my home country two months priorly and that leaves me with a decision to leave my flat earlier. Can you please let me know the next procedure for me in
this
 case? I was
also
 hoping to know if I am eligible for a 10% rent discount during those two months as I heard that my neighbour got that.
Furthermore
, is deep cleaning necessary before I leave the flat? Please let me know the cleaning expectation. And
lastly
, kindly let me know when can i get my bond back. I am looking forward to hearing from you. Kind regards, Nisa
Submitted by oktavianisaa123 on

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task achievement
Try to improve the request for the rent discount by providing more background information or context about your neighbor's situation. This makes your request stronger and more justified.
coherence cohesion
Consider adding a brief introduction about your pleasant experience with the agency to create goodwill at the start. This might help in getting a more positive response.
coherence cohesion
Ensure consistency in tone and formality. While overall the tone is formal and appropriate, the phrase 'kindly let me know when can I get my bond back' should be 'kindly let me know when I can get my bond back.'
task achievement
The letter thoroughly addresses the main points: early departure, rent discount, cleaning requirements, and bond refund, showing a complete response to the task.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the letter is logical; it begins with the main concern, explains the situation, and then requests specific information, ensuring clarity and logical flow.
task achievement
The ideas in the letter are generally clear and easy to understand, making it effective in conveying the message to the recipient.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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