Nowadays tourism generates a significant portion of national income for many countries, but it has certain drawbacks too. This essay will examine the advantages and disadvantages of tourism and provide a logical conclusion
In recent years, there has been an unpredictable surge in
tourism
industry. Add an article
the tourism
Therefore
it contributes a huge amount of money in national income for some countries meanwhile, it also
increasing
unwanted circumstances. In Wrong verb form
increases
this
essay, I will explain some pros and cons of tourism
in ensuring paragraphs.
Today globalization has been
reached its highest peak, Unnecessary verb
apply
hence
people
of the world are preferred
to travel Wrong verb form
prefer
other
Change preposition
to other
places
. As a
result
the host country gets significant benefits. Add a comma
result,
Firstly
, it improves the overall
economy of the nation as tourism
provides good job opportunities to
Change preposition
for
people
. It is
directly Unnecessary verb
apply
affect
the Correct subject-verb agreement
affects
people
who lives
in Change the verb form
live
surrounding
Correct article usage
the surrounding
of
Change preposition
apply
tourist
places
, as a
result
they have become a part of Add the comma(s)
result,
tourism
industry so, it can lead to achieve Correct article usage
the tourism
a
personal and social development of Correct article usage
the
individual
. Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
Moreover
, with the
sufficient monetary Correct article usage
apply
support
the Add a comma
support,
states
authority can take incredible steps toward towards well-being of Fix the agreement mistake
state
community
.
Add an article
the community
However
, increasing numbers of tourists can lead to the
numerous consequences. Nowadays Correct article usage
apply
a
pollution level dramatically Correct article usage
the
increased
at Wrong verb form
increases
tourist
places
owing to, unbelievable numbers of people
visiting these places
. Apart from that, due to
high
Correct article usage
the high
efficasy
of tourists, locals are suffering from many things Correct your spelling
efficacy
such
as,
congestion, Remove the comma
apply
Correct article usage
the scarsity
scarsity
of resources ,traffic and Correct your spelling
scarcity
higher
cost of essential things. Correct article usage
the higher
hence
, sometime
Replace the word
sometimes
people
choose wrong
path Change the article
the wrong
for
earning money. Change preposition
to
For instance
, belonging
person has Add an article
a belonging
the belonging
Correct article usage
an increase
increase
cost of accommodation and popular things which Replace the word
increased
are attract
tourists. Even though, they Change the verb form
attract
doing
fraud and cheating with Wrong verb form
are committing
tourist
by manipulating them.
In conclusion, Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
although
tourism
has plays
a critical role Change the verb form
played
to develop
revenue for Change preposition
in developing
country
, it has various disadvantages. Correct article usage
a country
Thus
government have to take liability to maintain
Change preposition
for maintaining
tourist
place
in Fix the agreement mistake
places
appropriate
way, Add an article
an appropriate
the appropriate
as well as
give an
enough attention Remove the article
apply
for
Change preposition
to
progress
of society.Add an article
the progress
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task achievement
To enhance your task response, ensure that your essay fully addresses all parts of the task. For example, provide more balanced arguments by equally discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of tourism in your body paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, organize your ideas and support them logically. Use clear topic sentences and ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly into the next. Also, make sure that your points are well-supported with specific examples.
general
Work on grammatical accuracy and range. While minor inaccuracies won't drastically affect your score, frequent grammatical errors can impede clarity. Focus on sentence structure, verb tenses, and subject-verb agreement.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to the use of linking words and phrases. Effective use of cohesive devices can enhance the connection between sentences and paragraphs, which in turn improves readability.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction clearly outlines the topic and sets the stage for the discussion. Good job!
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion succinctly summarizes the key points discussed in the essay and provides a logical end to your argument.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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