Traffic and housing problems could be solved by moving large companies, factories and their employees to the countryside. Do you agree or disagree?
Many
high education
people do not agree about Add a hyphen
high-education
scientificial
Correct your spelling
scientific
research
being done by our government
rather than individual
company with many people Add an article
an individual
say
the Wrong verb form
saying
government
can do it better. The writer of the essay completely disagree
with the school Correct subject-verb agreement
disagrees
thought
and shall Change preposition
of thought
serious
explain the motives of Change the adjective
seriously
this
ill action.
On the one hand, individually finance
scientific Wrong verb form
financed
research
has done a lot
for innovation because they are more free
do whatever they want and they want to spend their Correct word choice
freer to
money
on good actions. Those who do research
for companies are free to think of whatever want and let their imagine
go crazy. If the Replace the word
imagination
governments
do not believe them, they cannot do the research
, and therefore
, lose their money
to other people. Inaddition
, companies should be Correct your spelling
In addition
charge
of scientific Change preposition
in charge
research
because of freedom for the scientists who is
doing good for Change the verb form
are
the
society.
To the best of my recollection, it is Correct article usage
apply
advantages
if Replace the word
advantageous
governments
do scientific research
because they can have a lot
of money
. Private companies can do wrong the research
because they can change it to make a lot
of money
to give in to there
greed. On the opposite, Replace the word
their
governments
make research
to have more solutions to solve problems such
as poverty, global warming, diseases and women’s rights. Others such
as computer machine
, human rights and animal rights. Fix the agreement mistake
machines
For example
, the government
’s railway system was chosen because there were less
accidents on it than the private company’s. Change the quantifier
fewer
This
show
that Correct subject-verb agreement
shows
governments
better
at scientific Add a missing verb
are better
research
.
In conclusion, private research
can innovate a lot
, but government
research
is meant to be the better option. Scientists will able
to pay more attention to Add a missing verb
be able
government
research
and they can become heroes to save the nation.Submitted by writingeilts on
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clarity
Improve the clarity of your ideas and make sure they are comprehensive. Some sentences are unclear and can be confusing for readers.
examples
Provide more relevant and specific examples to support your arguments. This will make your essay more convincing.
structure
Focus on creating a more logical structure. Ensure that your arguments are clearly linked and that each paragraph flows logically from one to the next.
task response
You have made a clear attempt to address both sides of the argument, which is a good foundation for a balanced essay.
structure
You have included an introduction and a conclusion, which helps frame your essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.