The bar chart below shows the international student enrolments at three universities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make a comparison where relevant.
The bar chart illustrates overseas
learners
admitted at Smithtown University
, University
of Riverview and Earlwood University
. The unit is measured in number of students. Overall
, Bharat was the topmost undergraduates
admitted to Riverview Fix the agreement mistake
undergraduate
college
and Capitalize word
College
lowest
Correct article usage
the lowest
scholars
Correct quantifier usage
number of scholars
were
received from the people of Columbia.
Change the verb form
was
To begin
with, Indians were the topmost undergraduates admitted at Riverview college
with approximately 7500 scholars followed by citizens of Nepal with 5000 Capitalize word
College
learners
and Vietnam with 4000 learners
. Acceptance
Correct article usage
The acceptance
rate
from the people of Columbia and Indonesia hits the lowest rate
of about 1800 and 1500 respectively.
In addition
, foreigners from Bharat remains
Correct subject-verb agreement
remain
topmost
undergraduates admitted at Smithtown Correct article usage
the topmost
college
with 6000 scholars and Nepal accounted for 5000 Capitalize word
College
learners
followed by Vietnam with about 4000 learners
. Finally
, Earlwood college
accounted Capitalize word
College
the
lowest Change preposition
for the
acceptance
rate
from overseas schoolers with Indians, Nepal and Vietnam hitting the overall
acceptance
rate
of about 5000,4500 and 4000 learners
respectively. Citizens from Colombia and Indonesia accounted for fewer
Fix the agreement mistake
a lower
acceptance
rate
into Earlwood University
.Submitted by priscillaagyeiwaaboahen on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
▼
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words learners, university, college, acceptance, rate with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
▼