The most important aim of science ought to be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Scientific developments are occurring at a great rate but some of them do not seem to be of help
people
. In fact, sometimes scientific innovations are regretted by those who invented them. Change preposition
to people
This
essay will argue that science should never harm people but scientists
should aim o
Correct your spelling
to
further
their understanding as much as to improve people’s lives
.
On the one hand, there is a strong argument that the public good should be top
priority for Add an article
a top
the top
scientists
. They are the ones who have the potential to make discoveries and invent things that can change the world. Electricity, modern medicine, telecommunication and the internet are just some of the scientific innovations that have changed lives
for the better.
On the other hand
, sometimes scientists
do research just in the hope of adding to their knowledge while
they should make absolutely sure that their experiments do no harm, they may not know until they have finished how their finding
will be used and Fix the agreement mistake
findings
weather
they will improve people’s Correct your spelling
whether
lives
. This
scientists
Nobel invented dynamite to help with mining, not knowing that it would one day be used in weapons, and Fix the agreement mistake
scientist
scientist
who discovered the life-saving drug penicillin did quite by chance.
Correct article usage
the scientist
Overall
, it seems that science should improve the lives
of people and that ought to be one of aims
. Correct pronoun usage
its aims
However
, knowledge and discovery are aims in themselves and are just as important for scientists
. Sometimes scientists
do no
know how their scientific breakthroughs will be used until their Correct your spelling
not
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
done
.Add a missing verb
is done
Submitted by saja.alotaibi on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence
You have clearly structured your essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, there are areas where you can improve the logical flow and clarity of your arguments. Consider using more topic sentences to clearly signal the main idea of each paragraph.
task response
In some parts, your essay contains minor grammatical errors and occasional awkward phrasing. For example, "whether they will improve people’s lives" instead of "weather they will improve people’s lives". Try to proofread your work to eliminate these issues.
task response
You present relevant examples, such as the invention of dynamite and penicillin, but you could enhance your arguments by explaining these examples more thoroughly and linking them more explicitly to your main points.
introduction conclusion
Your introduction sets up the argument well, and your conclusion effectively summarizes your viewpoints.
relevant specific examples
You have used specific examples to illustrate your points, which strengthens your arguments.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.