The graphs below show the percentage of men and women aged 60-64 who were employed in four counthies in 1970 and 2000. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

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The bar diagram compares the proportions of employed males and

females

Use synonyms

Belgium

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, USA,

Japan

Use synonyms

and Australia in the age category 60-64 years in 1970 and 2000.

Overall

Linking Words

it is immediately apparent

thathat

Correct your spelling

that hat

that

more males than

females

Use synonyms

were employed in

this

Linking Words

age group in the two different years. Looking at the male group, the number of men who worked in 1970 decreased by 2000 in all four countries.

Japan

Use synonyms

had the highest percentage of working males at 85% in 1970.

This

Linking Words

was followed by 79% in

Belgium

Use synonyms

. Meanwhile, in 2000,

Japan

Use synonyms

witnessed a little less than

Correct article usage

a 10

show examples

% drop but

Belgium

Use synonyms

by contrast

Linking Words

saw a dramatic reduction

Change preposition

show examples

60%. USA and Australia

on the other hand

Linking Words

, made insignificant decreases of 18% and 28% respectively from 1970 to 2000. Turning to the

females

Use synonyms

, whilst

Japan

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recorded the highest percentage of women with jobs,

Belgium

Use synonyms

however

Linking Words

, had the

least

Correct word choice

lowest

show examples

number of working

females

Use synonyms

in the two different years.

Also

Linking Words

notably

Change the word

notable

show examples

among the women is the 3% and 2% increase in employment rates made in the USA and Australia respectively from 1970 to 2000.

Submitted by nmaureen03 on Fri Jul 05 2024

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Vocabulary: Replace the words females, belgium, japan with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.

▼

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

181 words

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The graphs below show the percentage of men and women aged 60-64 who were employed in four counthies in 1970 and 2000. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

many people think that live now is better than in the past. discuss this argument

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Throughout history, male leaders have led us into violence and conflict. If a society is governed by female leaders it will be more peaceful. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?