In many countries, a small number of people earn extreamly high salaries.Some people believe that this is good for the country, but others think that Governments should not allow salaries above a criteria level. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
Some
people
may earn immense amount
of Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
money
in many nations. While
some agree that it would be beneficial for the country
, others support the restriction of salaries
through the government. This
essay will contain several reasons about each notion, and finally
explain why I believe that high salaries
should not above
a certain limit.
On the one hand, It is widely accepted that individuals with more Add a missing verb
be above
money
have a crucial impact on a country
's economy. Therefore
, allowing anyone who makes an exceedingly high salary without any restriction. Instead
, the government should implement and promote new policies that encourage more people
to make huge numbers of money
, which increases the nation's economic prosperity. For example
, giving credits to entrepreneurs who have the potential to be rich person that may robust the economy of the country
.
On the other hand
, I would agree that besides
the economic profits that a country
gains through letting citizens earn extreme salaries
there are some drawback that leads a social eradication and the authority
must control Fix the agreement mistake
authorities
people
's money
. Initially
, if somebady
sees anyone who has a very Correct your spelling
somebody
high level
Add a hyphen
high-level
salaries
it may allocate social Fix the agreement mistake
of salary,
cohesive
that plays a Replace the word
cohesion
brindge
to marge Correct your spelling
role
people
regardless of their socio-economic status. Furthermore
, impediments in this
affair would have devastating results for the community unity of the nation.
In conclusion , Supporting the investment of people
in the free market in order to make them rich apparently is a profitable approach to the country
's economic progress. However
, allowing individuals to become extraordinarily wealthier than others creates social imperatives between high and low economic status. It is better to be remunerative under the government limitation.Submitted by Yasar Khan on
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task achievement
The essay could benefit from a more clearly stated thesis in the introduction. It's important to present your opinion from the start and to develop it consistently throughout the essay.
task achievement
Some of your ideas could be expanded upon in more detail. In particular, the essay could include more specific examples and evidence to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your paragraphs are clearly structured with a topic sentence, supporting details, and a concluding sentence. This will improve the overall coherence and cohesion of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to sentence structure and clarity. Some sentences in your essay are lengthy and could be broken down for better readability and understanding.
task achievement
You have addressed both views of the topic, which demonstrates a balanced approach in your essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame the discussion.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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