The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

#process #sugar #cane #summarise #information #features #comparisons

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The diagram process below displays the way sugar is produced

Firstly

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this

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manufacture begins with a herb called

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sugarcane. It grows from one to one and a half years.

Then

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, the farmers collect these sugarcanes. After that, these plants

Wrong verb form

are

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crushed and transformed into

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juice.

This

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natural spirit is dirty enough to make it unhealthy, so it goes through a limestone filter. With the help of a heater,

this

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clear liquid becomes a syrup. Tiny

sugar-crystals

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sugar crystals

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, inside of that sirup,

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are

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separated from an actual substance.

Finally

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, after all of

this

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procedure, these saccharose molecules get dried and cooled down.

This

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results in receiving

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sweet sand.

Overall

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, there are seven steps, which are growing, harvesting, crushing, purifying juice, evaporating, separating sugar crystals from syrup, drying and cooling. There are some equipment, which are crusher, limestone filter, evaporator

and

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etc. There is only one resource, which is sugarcane.

Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on Wed Jul 10 2024

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

150 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

manufacturing process
sugar cane
harvesting
transporting
factory
crushing
extracting
juice
filtering
impurities
heating
evaporating
syrup
boiling
crystallizing
sugar
separating
drying
packaging
distribution
stage
process

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The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

In many countries today, if people want to find work, they have to move away from their friends and their families. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Many people try to achieve success through their career or education. What can success mean to different people? What is your view of success?

many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities. does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?