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Writing Samples
Band 4

The table below shows the number of temporary migrant worker in four countries in 2003 and 2006 and the number of these workers per 1,000 people in these countries in 2006. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows the number of temporary migrant worker in four countries in 2003 and 2006 and the number of these workers per 1,000 people in these countries in 2006. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#worker #four #countries #workers #people #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The given table displays the data about the
number
Use synonyms
 of
employer
Change to a plural noun
employers
show examples
 who migrate
Temporary
Change the word
temporarily
show examples
 in four countries Australia, New
Zealand
Use synonyms
, United Kingdom, and United States in
two
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
 years 2003 and 2006.
As well
Rephrase
Also
show examples
,
this
Linking Words
 graph
provides how
Verb problem
shows
show examples
 many
Numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
Number
show examples
 of these
workers
Use synonyms
 per 1000 people in 2006 in all countries.
Linking Words
overall
Capitalize word
Overall
show examples
, the
Numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
Number
show examples
 of these
workers
Use synonyms
 increased gradually in these countries from the years 2003 to 2006.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the United States
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 the highest
number
Use synonyms
 in both years,
whereas
Linking Words
 New
Zealand
Use synonyms
 had the lowest
number
Use synonyms
 of
employer
Fix the agreement mistake
employers
show examples
. The
number
Use synonyms
 of
workers
Use synonyms
 in the United States started at 577 in 2003,
then
Linking Words
 went up to 678.A similar amount of increase
observed
Add a missing verb
was observed
show examples
 in the
number
Use synonyms
 of Australia's
workers
Use synonyms
, and the United Kingdom's
workers
Use synonyms
,around 100
workers
Use synonyms
 in 2003,arrived at Just above 200
workers
Use synonyms
 in 2006,
By contrast
Linking Words
, New
Zealand
Use synonyms
 had the
fewest
Correct your spelling
lowest
show examples
number
Use synonyms
 of
workers
Use synonyms
 being at 65 in 2003 and grow up by 20% in 2006. Regarding
to
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
number
Use synonyms
 per 1000 people, the order of
workers
Use synonyms
 from the highest to lowest namely
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
state
Fix the agreement mistake
States
show examples
,Australia,
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom and New
Zealand
Use synonyms
Submitted by MM2 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 73%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, zealand, workers with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 7 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • temporary migrant workers
  • trends
  • absolute numbers
  • per 1,000 people
  • growth rate
  • per capita
  • labor markets
  • economies
  • significant
  • imply
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