IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purpose in six areas of the world. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparions where relevant.

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purpose in six areas of the world. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparions where relevant.
#show #percentage #water #purpose #six #areas #world #summarise #information #features #comparions
The pie charts
give
Verb problem
show
show examples
 the proportion of
water
 utilised
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 various purposes
such
 as industrial
use
, agricultural
use
, and domestic
use
 in six areas of the world - North
America
, South
America
, Europe, Africa, Central
Asia
, and South East
Asia
.
Overall
, 4 areas - South
America
, South East
Asia
, Central
Asia
, and Africa witness the highest amount of
water
 expenditure on agricultural
sectors
.
While
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 Europe and North
America
 spend the most
water
 on industrial
sectors
.
Furthermore
, all areas spend
least
Correct article usage
the least
show examples
 on domestic
use
campare
Correct your spelling
compare
compared
 to other
sectors
. It can
bee
Correct your spelling
be
show examples
 clearly seen that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 North
America
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and
Europes
Fix the agreement mistake
Europe
show examples
use
water
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 industry
approximately
Change preposition
at approximately
show examples
 53%, and
then
 around 39% is used in agriculture.
Further
, 13% of
water
 usage in North
America
, and 15% of
water
 in Europe
have
Verb problem
is
show examples
 used in domestic
sectors
. On the
othe
Correct your spelling
other
 hand, South
America
, South East
Asia
, Africa, and Central
Asia
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
significant
Change the word
significantly
show examples
 used
water
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
agricultural
Add an article
the agricultural
show examples
 sector, at 71%, 81%, 84%, and 88%, respectively.
While around
Correct word choice
Around
show examples
 9% of
water
have
Verb problem
is
show examples
 used in
demestic
Correct article usage
the demestic
show examples
sectosr
Correct your spelling
sector
sectors
, and around 12%
Add a missing verb
is use
show examples
use
Replace the word
used
show examples
 in
industrial
Correct article usage
the industrial
show examples
sectors
.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words water, use, america, asia, sectors with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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