Many people now undertake extreme activities, from hang-gliding to mountain climbing. Why do people risk their lives in this way, and do you think this is a good trend?
In today's world,
people
tend to be adventurous and want to involve themselves in extreme activities
such
as hand gliding and mountain climbing. This
essay will discuss the reason to
why Change preposition
apply
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
people
risk
their life
by indulging in Fix the agreement mistake
lives
such
activities
and also
provide my opinion with profounding evidence.
Firstly
, many individuals believes
in one Change the verb form
believe
life
. In that case, they take this
quote "live life
or leave life
" very seriously. This
quote resembles the risk
that people
take into consideration and can be a motivation for pupil
undertaking these dangerous Fix the agreement mistake
pupils
activities
. For example
, many people
are under confident
and fear taking Correct your spelling
underconfident
risk
in Fix the agreement mistake
risks
life
in comparision
with the Correct your spelling
comparison
people
who are involved in these activities
. These activities
not only gives
Change the verb form
give
a
Change the article
an
adernaline
rush in the body but Correct your spelling
adrenaline
also
helps
to boost their confidence in Correct subject-verb agreement
help
life
. This
is why people
tend to opt for these activities
.
Furthermore
, this
tend
has not only Correct your spelling
trend
help
Wrong verb form
helped
people
to overcome fear but also
helps them in their decision making
. Add a hyphen
decision-making
For example
, many people
has
Change the verb form
have
a
stage fear and tend to lack their Correct article usage
apply
decision making
Add a hyphen
decision-making
while
speaking in front of public
. In Add an article
the public
such
cases, people
tend to grow less. In addition
, one study showed that people
who are involved in high
Add a hyphen
high-risk
risk
activities
are more confident in their decision making
in Add a hyphen
decision-making
comparision
to Correct your spelling
comparison
who
do not.
Correct pronoun usage
those who
To conclude
, this
trend of taking part in extreme activities
is a positive trend. This
is because,
it helps in building skills Remove the comma
apply
such
as decision making
Add a hyphen
decision-making
while
being in public.Submitted by ankushkhandu on
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grammar
Work on sentence structure and grammar to reduce errors. For example, 'hand gliding' should be 'hang-gliding', and 'to why do people' should be 'why people'.
examples
Ensure that all main points are well-supported with more specific examples. General statements without examples make arguments less convincing.
organization
Better organization will improve coherence and cohesion. Ensure each paragraph has one main idea, and use transition sentences effectively.
conclusion
Conclusion should reiterate the key points discussed in the main body to give a sense of closure and completeness.
content
Despite some grammatical errors, the essay presents a clear discussion on why people might engage in extreme activities.
conclusion
The concluding paragraph encapsulates the author’s viewpoint effectively, reinforcing the arguments made in the essay.